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Al Kneal
"Excuse me. I have to go make a scene."
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"I'm dying."
"You're dead."
"Shut up, Eli."
"You first."
"I hate you."
"No, you don't."
This was the usual morning banter for the two Viking off-springs.
It was 7 am on a Tuesday, Alf's least favorite day of the week.
Of course, it had to be Eli's favorite day.
Sometimes, Alf found it hard to believe they were even related. They were like two mushrooms on opposite sides of a field.
That's what they were, really.
. . . Opposites, not mushrooms.
Who ever heard of a Viking mushroom?
Alf shook his head, smiling to himself.
"Hey, Eli, you ever heard of a-"
CRACK
The twins whipped around, eyes searching for the thing that made the noise.
There was nobody here to come now, the tribe was long gone.
Alf couldn't remember anyone passing their woods in centuries.
He thinks.
Maybe.
Meh.
He heard Eli's breath hitch in excitement.
"Alf, ALF, there is a lady! She-she. Oh. My. God."
Alf turned, concerned. "Eli, what is it-Holy thor she looked at me. She is LOOKING AT ME."
Eli let out a laugh. "You're squealing, brother. Calm yourself."
"But she's staring at me!"
"No, you're staring at her-Holy shit she's staring at us."
"I already knew that but okay."
"Shut up."
"You wish."
Eli stuck her tongue out at her twin, then carefully regained her posture.
The lady stepped forward, foot cracking a brittle twig.
"Hello," She said softly. "do you need-"
"CHARGE!"Yelled Alf, rushing towards her.
The lady looked startled, and Eli facepalmed as Alf fell straight through her, gagging.
The boy wheezed, hands on his knees as he tried to stop retching. "Oh god I need to stop doing that-"
"YOU ARE GHOSTS!" The lady yelled.
"Doesn't take a genius." Deadpanned Eli.
The lady took a deep breath. "Okay, okay. My name is Alison, who are you?"
Alf brightened. "Oooh! I love this game! I'm Alf, and I'm a Viking in training-"
"You never started your training, dimwit-" Scoffed Eli, "And why are you communicating with the enemy? Don't you remember the 1 rule of being a Viking?"
Alf sighed. "Never give away information to the enemy."
Eli nodded. Alison shook her head. "I'm not your enemy! I want to help, see, ever since I fell out a window, I have been able to see ghosts-"
"YOU FELL OUT A WINDOW??" SHrieked Alf. "I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THAT."
Eli pinched the bridge of her nose, inhaling in annoyance.
*****
As they arrived back at Button House, Alison smiled.
"I can't wait for you to meet the other ghosts, I'm sure they will love you."
Eli nodded. "Thanks...I guess? Sorry, it's just been us for the past millennia or two, just trying to get used to another person."
Alison nodded understanding. "I could introduce you one at at time if that would help."
