As the bus doors creaked open, my nerves kicked into high gear. Plastering on a smile, I headed toward my best friend Kayley waiting at the school entrance.
"Emma, over here!" she called, waving excitedly, her lavender hair flowing in her ponytail. I took a deep breath and joined her, trying to match her energy despite my fear churning inside.
"Isn't this so exciting? Our last first day of high school!" Kayley gushed, not noticing my stiff smile. I glanced down at our matching black and blue cheer uniforms, a symbol of the persona I showed the world - happy, peppy Emma who loved being the center of attention.
If only she knew the truth. With my secrets, one wrong word could ruin everything. As Kayley chattered on about our senior year plans, my smile faded, eyes scanning the crowd for threats.
The first bell rang, signaling us inside to home room. Kayley linked her arm in mine, continuing to talk a mile a minute. I nodded and laughed in all the right places, clinging to her normalcy like a lifeline in the sea of my anxiety.
As Kayley chattered, I steered us toward home room. We slipped into our usual seats in the back just as the late bell rang.
Noah turned from in front of me and smiled brightly. "Senior year, can you believe it?" she said, tucking a stray blonde curl behind her ear.
I smiled back, relieved as always by her easygoing nature. "It's crazy. Do you think Mr. Stevenson will cry again like last year?"
Noah laughed just as our bald-headed teacher entered, his eyes already watery. "Good morning, my favorite seniors! I promise I won't get too emotional..." he sniffled.
The class groaned, but I saw Kayley beam out of the corner of my eye. I was glad at least one of us was excited. As Noah launched into a story, I glanced around nervously, taking in each face. So far, none seemed to see what I feared was visible - the girl hiding her true self, day after day, just waiting for it all to shatter like glass.
Mr. Stevenson handed back our schedules. My chest tightened as I glanced at mine, dreading what it might say.
"We've got math together," Noah said brightly. At least something good to start.
Kayley pointed out we had history together too. But my heart sank when I saw my second and fourth hours. Science alone I could handle, but English...
"You've got Ms. Clarke?" asked Noah, seeing my face fall. I nodded grimly.
"Ugh, the Ice Queen. I've got Mr. White, he's so nice!" chirped Kayley. Of course she got the nice teacher while I was thrown to the wolves.
I clenched my schedule tightly, feeling sick. All I could muster was a weak smile at Kayley's reassurance of lunch together. But inside, dread swirled.
When Mr. Stevenson said we could chat until the bell, Kayley turned to Noah excitedly.
"So seriously, why haven't you tried out for cheer yet? You'd be amazing!" she pressed.
Noah shrugged. "It's just not really my thing. I'm more of a science geek, you know that."
Kayley nodded at me. "But Emma and I could help you practice! It would be so fun if we were all on the squad together."
I smiled weakly at the thought. As much as I loved cheer, the performance aspect terrified me.
"Come on Noah, please?" Kayley gave her best puppy dog eyes. Noah glanced at me, and for a moment I wondered if she saw through my smile too. But finally she laughed.
"Alright alright, I'll think about it. No promises though!"
As they chatted excitedly about tryouts, I stared down at my schedule again. I wished my biggest worries were as simple as cheering—not hiding a part of myself from this whole school each day.
YOU ARE READING
Masks Always Fall
RomanceA war between the mind and heart. Emma did her best to fade into the background, avoiding attention at all costs. As a foster kid still scarred by her homophobic parents' abuse, confrontation terrified her. She played the part of the perfect studen...