✅ Younger Twin [NaNoWriMo2023]

17 - Triana's Acceptance

This chapter is dedicated to reqresser. Thank you!

I might have drunk a little too much squash the night before, refilling my cup after Daddy told me it was time for bed once we finished. I might have gone to talk to Taylor instead when Mummy said it was time to go to the bathroom again before bed. I might even have woken in the early hours of the morning, thought about how soft and warm my bed was, and then talked myself into going back to sleep on the grounds that Nik rarely let himself out of his crib even if we were allowed to. There were any number of reasons I might have woken up clammy and surrounded by the smell of pee.

But I knew right away what the real reason was. It had to be because Mummy and Daddy hadn't paid enough attention to me; always treating Nik like their favourite just because he was such a baby. I needed to get their attention back, and I was sure I knew how to do that. I glanced over to Nik, and saw that he was sitting up in his crib with a huge grin on his face, almost laughing at me for an accident that could have happened to anyone, and had certainly happened to him more than once. Well, I didn't need to worry about waking him, then. And I could already hear Taylor's alarm from the next room, so I guessed that everyone else would be awake soon enough.

I didn't get out of bed. I didn't try to clean everything up. I didn't rush to the bathroom for a shower to get the icky feeling off my skin, or quickly start dragging sheets to the laundry bag before it could soak into the mattress too much. I couldn't do any of those things, because I was good enough to obey the house rules. I wasn't allowed to do anything Nik wouldn't do, and I was already certain that he wasn't the type to clean up after himself in any circumstances.

Instead I raised my voice and called "No!", then raised one arm to pound on the wall. That would make sure I had their attention, and I was absolutely certain it was what my twin brother would have done in the circumstances. It wasn't long before the door burst open and Mummy was standing there, her expression and the state of her hair telling me that she had come straight out of bed.

"What's he done n–"

"Tiss oopsie!" Nik interrupted, pointing with a considerable amount of energy, bouncing in his crib. I felt myself blushing at the accusation; but I wished there was some way I could get him to start forming actual sentences. It was getting harder and harder to convince myself that I was allowed to speak while Nik would just spit out a single word, or two at most, to let us know what was on his mind. I was sure he was capable of more, and I kept telling myself that, but a part of me knew that I couldn't base my behaviour on that for too long.

"Ohh, Triana," Mummy said, the disappointment dripping from her words. "Did you have a little accident? And you've not even been out of diapers for a day. Maybe that was a mistake, no?"

I was blushing now, and I couldn't believe that I'd let Mummy down like that. Of course, I really knew that they'd been the ones demanding that I wasn't any more mature than my brother; but it didn't stop the waves of shame threatening to consume me. I couldn't do anything; I just lay there while Mummy lowered the side of my crib and lifted me out, setting me down on a towel from the laundry bag so that I wouldn't be dripping on the carpet. I knew that I could have stepped off it in an instant; but I wasn't prepared to cause real problems for my parents. I took a deep breath, and watched as she quickly stripped the bed and threw everything into a bag for washing.

"Somebody's up early?" Dad's voice came from the doorway. "Our little monster... oh?"

"Tiss weewee!" Nik explained, bouncing up and down on his mattress and pointing accusingly. I hid my face behind my hands, and wished that the floor would swallow me up then. I knew that this was what I had to do according to the rules, and that this was a condition of getting closer to what I really wanted; but it was still hard to cope with. I dried my eyes on my sleeve though. I couldn't let Taylor see me if she came in. If she saw me crying, she would demand that I stop this, and there was no way I could stand up against my big sister once she was angry about something. To even get far enough to test my vaguest inkling, I had to hide my discomfort from her.