Can't be myself

Chapter 3

I sat under a tree waiting for Lexi to try to scare me by hanging upside down on the tree. She's done this for three years, so it doesn't faze me. "Boo!" Lexi said finally arriving. "So, you excited?" "For what?" I asked, "New school?" Oh ya, a new school, another hellhole, I zoned out and imagined kissing Lexi, but it was weird cause we were right at this tree. Then I got out of that daydream, trying to get it out of my mind. We just sat down and looked away, don't know why she was but I wasn't sure why I was either. I ended up asking her, "Have you ever liked a girl?" And immediately my brain regretted that. "Kinda?" She replied, "like I don't know if I actually like the girl, or I just gender admiration." She finished. "Who is or was the girl?" I asked and she tensed up, giving the idea that it's me or someone I'm friends with. "She- I can't explain!" She said beginning to (from what I think) have a panic attack. I immediately hugged her and tried to calm her. But just then she kissed me, like on the lips! I kissed back, but she stopped and looked at me and ran away! I started crying cause my crush just kissed me, then ran away!

Mom let me go to the park for a bit, no I did not tell her about the kiss. I sat on a bench waiting, no idea what I was waiting for, just for something. "Mia, is that you?" Josh said as he walked by the bench, "yep! How many times will I see you?" I asked with a laugh. "A lot!" He said as he sat down next to me. "How's it been?" He asked, "let's just say it hasn't gone good but it hasn't gone bad." I replied. "And let's just say, your not the only gay one..." I immediately regretted saying that. He looked at me confused then realized. "Have you at least had your first kiss?" I remember today. "Y-yea.." I said, "today.." he asked who.... "L-lexi...." I said. "Are y'all dating then?" He asked, "N-no, she kinda ran away, after she kissed me, I'm not mad, but that was not what I expected on a Thursday afternoon." I said with a laugh. He changed the subject, "Let's just say, your gonna be out of that hellhole, hopefully soon, like the next few days." I was confused, "Huh?" Then he told me. "I'm getting you out of that hellhole." He said and I realized.

"Go pack your bags!" He said as I ran inside, Josh following behind. "Disownment means your not family, you know that right f(slur)!?" Mom asked as she saw Josh. "Yea I know, just here to help Mia pack her things." Mom was confused. "Just so she's ready if she gets disowned." He said and mom looked at me. "What does he mean by that?" She asked, "Mom I'm gay, fuck me, I'm a d(slur)! Disown me, I don't give a crap, you'll probably have a replacement for me in the next year!" I said as I ran to my room, grabbing as much clothes, toys and anything. "You know what I'd rather have no children than have a d(slur) and a f(slur)!" She screamed as we walked out the door. "So eight years later, you kept your promise!" I said as he turned on his car.

"Babe, I'm home!" Josh yelled as I heard tiny footsteps, and a little girl, probably about 6 walked down followed by Chase. "Crap I forgot to tell you, you have a niece!" Josh said as Chase noticed me. She ran to Josh and he picked her up. "Daddy, who's dis?" She asked, "Mya, this is your aunt Mia!" He said as she went down. "Aren't you "permanently" banned from seeing Mia?" Chase asked, "Two things, one I'm not the only disowned one, and two... you wanna tell him?" Josh asked as I said, "He's not the only gay one..." Chase just looked me up and down and said, "Checks out." "Kept my promise after 8 years!" Josh said as Mya hugged me. "Mya, wanna come show Mia her room?" Josh asked as Mya nodded, as i followed, seeing I will be sharing with Mya. She decorated her room with stickers and book covers. It's actually a really good room!