Super Dragon Ball: Paradise Hysteria

The Means of Cell's Survival

"No. 8, take Dr. Flappe away from here. Get him to Bulma's at Capsule Corps," Lapis glanced at Super No. 8 while Piccolo, Super No. 8, Lapis, and Cell stared each other down.

"Thank you, that might be an excellent idea," the Super Artificial Human nodded with a kind-hearted smile before turning around and approaching Dr. Flappe. "Fighting off Cell while it continuously preys on the poor doctor will be troublesome."

"Don't get any wrong ideas," Lapis dismissed Super Android No. 8's worries. "I'm not worried about the old crone's lapdog or anything. I just want Cell focused on me as opposed to enthralled with its target."

"You? Interesting, what might you offer me that I don't already possess? I'll let you in on the know that upon returning from Trunks' doomed future I had the choice of retaining any one set of cells since I had to revert to my larval form to fit inside the time machine. I chose the Artificial Human set, meaning that your cells are entirely useless to me," Cell interjected while Piccolo and Lapis stepped in front of the Super Android as a protective wall to give Super No. 8 and Dr. Flappe a bit of time to retreat from the battlefield.

"I'll give you my offer once Dr. Flappe is out of here and after we put a proper beat down on you and you're more manageable and willing to listen," Lapis punched his open palm in a show of force.

"That's an interesting approach from a ranger," Piccolo snickered with a display of his fiendish fangs.

"You'd be surprised how many monsters I need to bully into coming with me to the reserve," Lapis shrugged Piccolo's friendly jabs at him with indifference.

"Let's go, Dr. Flappe. You should be safe in Capsule Corps," Super No. 8 picked Dr. Flappe off the ground into his chunky arms and prepared to take off when Cell suddenly plunged its tail into the snowy ground underneath. At incredible speed, the tail burrowed underground and the stinger burst forth directly in front of Super No. 8 like a lunging snake, ready to kill its prey with the Super Android's arms fully occupied by his precious cargo.

"I won't let you get out of here alive and leak intelligence on me!" Cell exclaimed in a triumphant tone.

Lapis became a blur, dashing in front of the lunging tail and grabbing the stinger before it could plunge into the cradled scientist. Lapis' free arm lit up with an emerald electric crackle as the Artificial Human swiped it like a blade in a chopping motion and split the tail horizontally in half. Cell croaked in pain and terror, stumbling back and withdrawing its tail back to him as it splattered thick, violet blood in all directions.

"It's dangerous for you two here, go already," Lapis turned to Super No. 8, who only nodded in confirmation and took off with Dr. Flappe in his hands.

"Those were some nice instincts," Piccolo commended his partner. "I got a little stiff and lowered my guard since I thought you'd attack me if I made a serious move on Cell..."

"Don't be ridiculous," Lapis ran his hand through his hair to settle it down in place after it picked up because of his rapid move. "As I've said–let's beat this guy's face in until it's more talkative. We're still partners, as long as you don't try to obliterate Cell."

"You..." Cell hissed, seething with sheer hatred. "I won't let my survival be jeopardized, do you hear me!? After all I've sacrificed, after every hurdle I've overcome, I will survive. No matter the price, I will live on! I'm entitled to it, as is everyone who was born!"

With a fleshy crunch, Cell's severed tail burst forth from the splattering wound, good as new and coated in a layer of murky green fat and violet blood that took no time at all to dry out and crumble to the snowy ground below. Neither Piccolo nor Lapis seemed surprised at this incredible feat of regeneration, they did just see Cell repair its entire body just now after all.