soukoku one shots

blurry

Chuuya came home from work at night, finally. He knew he had overworked a little bit that day, and his boyfriend also called him several times but he hadnt had the time to receive them. well anyway, as he takes his shoes off, he goes in with some snacks for his boyfriend, dazai, as a means of apology.

"I'm.. Home."

He didnt receive any response for a moment untill he went inside and saw Dazai again, trying to read a book in his room. He turned to Chuuya at once.
He quickly closed the book and hid it behind him.

"You're home? I've been calling you."

"Yeah. overworked a little.. i'm sorry." he apologised as he walked away from the room anyway.

Dazai was sure that he made chuuya somehow concerned again by trying to read a book once again. That wasnt the first time chuuya caught him doing so. Agh.

Dazai got up from his bed and followed chuuya.

"Chuuya, listen."

"Huh..? Read that book. You dont listen to me so why should i?" chuuya said in a soft but a bit concerned tone.

"How many fucking times do i have to remind you the doctor's words? It.. can worsen your eyesight. even.. more.. so please, Dazai." his tone at once turned even softer. Probably he was tired from overworking. Then, there was dazai again to ruin his mood even more.

"I'm not pressuring my eyes."

"Oh? But you are, you dimwit." he walked inside the bathroom to take a bath, ignoring Dazai's existence because he had been so done with him.

Dazai had an obsession of reading books even if he wasn't physically able to. Though he had been able to do it untill his condition kicked in.

Achromatopsia, a condition when a person only sees the colors white, black and shades of gray. the person also has difficulties in seeing, in fact, complete achromatopsia can cause blurry vision.

As he had that condition, he wasnt able to read so properly.. Nor see the colors.

But he once used to. He met chuuya before his condition kicked in, so he had known how chuuya looked with colors. He was the most beautiful man on earth for him. Didnt matter if he was with colors or without it.

He'd always been beautiful to him.

After chuuya got back from showering, he saw Dazai who was waiting for him sitting on his bed.

"Chuuya.. I'm sorry. I won't again. Really." his words were really sadly told. As if he didnt want to tell them to him because he would end up just doing it again.

"I know you like books. No, you love them. Its not good for your eyes though.. Nor is the sunlight. Nor am i." he said as he sat beside dazai.

He meant it. He didn't want to cause pressure on his eyes just to see him clearly.

Dazai's vision however, got than before. The faces became blurry as day passed. He couldn’t see the details of his boyfriend's face anymore. He couldn’t see the beauty anymore that perfectly. He wanted to cry.

He wanted to see Chuuya perfectly again. In good quality.

"Chuuya.." he held his hand at once and stayed silent. He then after some minutes of trying to have a good look of him, he realized he would never have it again.

Then gave in in his lap and hugged his waist, snuggling in his embrace.

"I miss you so much." he mumbled and closed his eyes, picturing the world, Chuuya in colors. That was all he could do.

Chuuya sighed and placed his arms around him, pulling him even closer. It turned into a cuddling session.

"Did you eat?" he asked suddenly.

"Yeah, you?" Dazai replied after several minutes. Chuuya nodded in response.

"Osamu.."

"hm..?"

"What is it.. That you miss the most?" as he asked that, dazai lifted his head up to face Chuuya. He wanted to see the details of his face again but he just couldnt. That made him feel worse. He then placed his cold hand on his cheek.

"...the color of your eyes."