All the bad things {18+}

All those bad days | 06

YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL ~ Lana Del Ray

......and all the ways
I got to know your pretty face and electric soul...

We had to go out together him and I, i hadn't left the house in months now, things were getting repetitive and i felt myself closing in, my mind shutting down on itself.
Hours of sleep no longer sufficed and insomnia became a part of me.

Everyday my space seemed to become smaller and every day i felt myself become more useless. I flip the pages of the documents i was supposed to co sign, these were barely sinking in as my mind was unable to give focus to anything.

Last week i asked for silence, i wanted no noise.. everything pricked at my skin, everything bit at my mind.

"Stop it! All of you." I screamed at them, I didn't care how crazy i looked. "I want no noise, take your training elsewhere and move me to a different floor. I don't want to be upstairs with that mad man anymore."

I flip the pages again.....i felt my hyperventilation start but i hold it up to my throat.
All the men had taken off their shoes and Mikhail was no exception and stayed away from the wing i locked myself in.

I had been moved to a different floor, it was also bulletproofed.

'He caused all this, none of this is any of my fault.'
I think to myself, he was driving me to certain madness, restricting my movement and at one point restricted all cell phones.

He took my devices and buried me in books like as if i was a sort of illiterate and proceeded to mock me in front of all his business associates, he stood by saying nothing and even laughing as sexist, rapist and racist jokes were made at my expense.
I wanted to leave but as a show of power i was denied that by Lomonosov.

I put up with the men licking their lips at me and continuing their jokes in Russian. When i was allowed to leave I went straight to the room i had stayed in up until then.

He moved the men's training so close to my window i would hear gunshots at the most random of times making me jolt awake in fear.
Mikhail was asked to keep his distance and so he did, becoming a complete stranger in less than a few moments.

When I complained of headaches and nausea i was given some pills. I had no idea what they did but out of fear I refused to take them, they sat forgotten in my closet.

I return my focus to the documents that said that a portion of my fortune had been resolved. I sign them, the simple action taking me one step towards freedom.

I throw the document back into the pile before trying to get some sleep hoping that it would get me out of the impending humiliation that would come if I dared step foot outside the house with that man.

Sleep evaded me, everything bothered me.....even the non existent sound of silence.
I couldn't put up with it the sound of my own heart beating and the sound of my own blood rushing in my ears.

I curl up further than i already was, the wind blows my window open, effectively putting out the fire in the fireplace.
This place was old fashioned in a sense, it didn't feel old but looked aged.

I want to sit up but i lay still. I feel the rain pour in, it came with full force and without mercy. Feeling the sharp stings of the water hitting at my skin took my mind off everything else.

This was the type of rain that would turn into snow by the morning.

I hear his ungentle knocks, they could almost rip the door off it's hinges.
'I hope that you're ready.'
I hear his muffled voice from behind the door, he knocks again.
'I'm not a fan of repeating myself.' He reminds

I hug my wet pillow more, the sheets i pulled over myself making a weird squelching sound as they too were also soaked.

After a series of rapid knocks, he barges in using the master key card.
I hear his footsteps and i try to lie as still as i could.

'Stupid girl.' I hear him mutter under his breath.
I hear the sound of the window closing.
'If you're going to kill yourself do it properly and spare me the trouble.'
I hear him take a deep breath before he places a finger to my neck so he could check my pulse.
'God, please just die... I need you dead. The sooner the better. She's supposed to be here not you.'

I hear him open the window again before walking out.
I snap my eyes open, I didn't care if he had a secret lover, fuck he could be seeing the whole of Russia behind my back but all i cared about was my safety.

I needed to get manual locks and Mikhail... whether i liked it or not he still was under Lomonosov's command.

I wait him out... i peek my head out into the hallway, seeing that he was no where to be seen I dash out looking for Mikhail.

I don't know what might've made me blind for a moment maybe it was my white hot rage or fear for my life but I managed to bump into the one person i sought to avoid at all cost.

I know i look stupid right now but I couldn't care less. My skims dress was wet and my hair stuck to my forehead and body and i was also barefoot.

He gives me a nasty look, one that was returned with its equivalent in rage.
Returning his focus to Mikhail he gives a command.

"Pick it up."
I look to see what he was talking about. It was just a handkerchief.
Mikhail bears a look of resentment in his eyes but picks it up either way.
He is about to give it to Lomonosov but i slap it out of his hands.

"What was the meaning of that?" Lomonosov questions.
"He is not a common errand boy." I say standing in front of him, now in between them both.
"He works for me, his pay checks come from my office, so he is what i say he is. Even my second in command isn't above the 'errand' you claim i sent him." He pauses and takes a breath. "Do as i say Mikhail. Pick. It. Up."

"Mikhail you are fired, pack your things and leave this house." Mikhail looks shocked and tries to protest.

"You can't do that." Lomonosov sniggers.

"Actually, yes i can. On the third paragraph of our 'marriage' documents it stated i had just as much power as you do in this house, including over the staff. I am free to fire and hire anyone at anytime without questions, not from even you." I pause in satisfaction seeing the look on his face. "Who's the illiterate now dipshit?"

He looks pissed. "I've told you, stop cussing." He raises his hand to hit me but I don't flinch.

"Hit me, i fucking dare you!"
"I wasn't going to hit you."
"Go fuck yourself." I turn my attention to Mikhail.
"You're rehired but this time you only answer to me, what ever my requests might be."

"Yes miss." He replies, the relief evident in his voice.

"Move your things upstairs, you'll be sharing a hallway with me."
"He isn't supposed to do that." Lomonosov says.

"Blow me Ashéwo." I reply with my middle finger up to his face.

(A/N: Ashéwo/Ashawo is a slang for prostitute in Nigeria. Pronounced Ash- eh- woh.)