All the bad things {18+}

Distortion|23

I hold the baby in my arms. His little coos and attempts to bite me with his two bottom teeth tugged at my heart strings.

I tried to suffocate him last night with a teddy bear. His laughs convinced me otherwise, he was a child.....my child.

Not 'it' or 'parasite' but a harmless child. One that i had ignored.
I kiss his palm, it's true........he looked like me. Too much but had his father's green eyes.

Now at one year, Andrei could stand on his own and walk really quickly, he even followed up on conversations.
Time really does fly.

"What happened here?" Lomonosov approaches gently. His shoes percussion on the wooden floor. He takes a step over the giant teddy bear's leg that always freaked me out.
I hated dolls that weren't My Scene, Barbie, MH or other related ones.

The rest were just creepy, including the obnoxiously large blue bear.
"Are you okay?" He asks, looking over my frame as i sit on the window seat.

"What do you think?" I turn to face him, he was crouching and tried to take Andrei from me.

"Don't, he's fine with me."
"He might be hungry." He looks to a clock across the hallway...he left the door open. "It's past his mealtime."

He takes him and stands up, holding his hand out to me.
"Let's go my love."
I take it, feeling compliant and tired.

He leads us downstairs and opens a cupboard stocked with baby food.
Giving me an apple, he tells me to sit as he makes Andrei's food.

This....this feels normal but i can't miss the nervous looks he steals at me.
"I'm not going to run away......calm yourself."

"Nothing it's just.......nothing, it's nothing." He finishes up.

"Isn't that too much for him?" I ask seeing the portion made. Seeing how puny Andrei came out, me being malnourished at the time and him a preemie, I was worried.

"He might need seconds." He throws me a sideways stare. "He eats a lot."

"Oh."

"How are you feeling?" He looks up at me as he's sat Andrei onto his baby stool.

"Good? Why?"
"Doctor gave all clear a while ago."
"All clear for what?"

"Sex......another baby."
"I'm not having another baby. Not with you."

"Then with who? Hmm?!" He doesn't look angry but switching up from the calm man he was was noticeable, I jump back a little.

"No one—I—I jus—" I struggle to find my voice.
"Ellie, don't run from me." He reaches out to me and grabs my hand.

"I'm coming up tonight, that's all."
My throat goes dry.

"O—Okay."

He gives a quick smile, one i feel obliged to return.

                 
••••••••••••••

                     

I feel the bed dip. My head is ringing.

"You reek of alcohol." The voice sounds distorted. I feel the person take off my shoes and takes my dress off at the straps.

He smells similar but my mind is a mess.
"M—Mikhail?"
I hear a sharp intake of breath.
"Yeah, it's me."
Those are all the words i need before basically jumping the person.

Turning us around, me now straddling him . I cup his face and press a kiss onto his lips.

"Open your mouth." I feel his hand on my waist. I open up as he immediately thrusts his tongue into my mouth.
"Hmmm, Ellie." He moans, it's sexy...i missed it.