your city gave me asthma // Wilbur Soot

thirty-four

My keys unlock the door and I push it open, revealing Maddie on my bed, Claire on hers. She looks as if she just woke up, finally.

"Hey Sky!" Maddie chirps. Her high school classes don't start for another week, and she'd rather be here than home alone, which I don't mind.

"Hi," I reply, setting my bag on my desk and handing the bagel to Claire.

"How was your first class?" She asks before taking a bite.

I kick off my shoes and sit next to Maddie on my bed. "Wilbur and Joey are in my class. Wilbur and Joey are in my class. The universe fucking hates me."

"No way!" Maddie gasps. "Was it awkward?"

I nod. "I didn't talk to Joey, but Wilbur sat with me. And we got breakfast. And oh my God, I miss him so badly. He's so pretty it hurts. He can't just expect me to be able to look at him and not want to kiss him all over. He's gonna find a new girl so fast. He's already gorgeous, but he has an accent, too. He's perfect and I lost him and now some other girl gets to have him."

"Hold on, is he dating someone new?" Claire creases her eyebrows.

"No, but he said he talked to another girl for a bit. He said he couldn't do it, but it shows he's able to think about other girls. I might actually drop out if I have to watch him fall in love with someone else."

"You're not dropping out." Claire tells me. "You'll just win him back. Use Joey to make him jealous."

"I'm not taking your advice that involves Joey ever again."

"Fair,"

Maddie leans against me. "I'm sorry, Sky. You can get him back, I promise."

"Yeah," I whisper, but I doubt it. I'll just live the rest of my life thinking of Wilbur, begging to have my British boy back.

My phone buzzes with a ringtone I haven't heard in forever. I immediately grab it and open up the message.

Wilbur: Hey

Wilbur: It's not on the EP but here is a song I wrote awhile ago if you wanna watch and give feedback.

Wilbur: Oh and it's called Amnesia

Wilbur: *Attached Video*

"Fuck," I mutter. "I can't watch this. I can't. Wilbur's sending me music he's wrote. It's probably about another girl. I can't handle it."

Claire moves over to my bed and stares down at my phone. "Play it! We need to find out."

I'm sure I'll regret it, but I open up the video. As it loads, I recognize his room he shared with Matt from London. His hair is a bit shorter, his face a bit red.

"That's your sweater, right?" Maddie asks, and I nod. One of the many sweaters I bought him and soaked in my perfume before I left. Finally, the video starts, Wilbur plucking his guitar.

"I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted.
I thought about our last kiss, how it felt, the way you tasted.
And even though your friends tell me you're doin' fine,
Are you somewhere feeling lonely, even though he's right beside you?
When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote you?
Sometimes I start to wonder, was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?
'Cause I'm not fine at all

I remember the day you told me you were leavin'
I remember the makeup running down your face
And the dreams you left behind, you didn't need them
Like every single wish we ever made.
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape
'Cause I'm not fine at all.