Try Harder

9:00pm

Buff was exhausted by the time he got the brick of RDX up to the top floor. Six floors was a lot to climb, especially with the creeping fear that what he was carrying could explode at any moment. His hair was mussed and his shirt was soaked through with sweat.

He opened the stairwell door to find Beka sitting in a leather chair, still playing Tetris. It looked as though she hadn't moved since he last spoke to her.

Her eyes lifted from her game for a moment, long enough to see it was just Buff, and then returned to her phone's tiny screen.

He nodded in her direction. She ignored him.

Buff marched past her and into the executive office where the rest of the team was waiting. N-Dig and Marcus were each stretched out on leather couches, listening to Doug. The tattooed young man was sitting on top of the big desk, telling stories about some of the film sets he'd worked on. Fou stood in the corner, away from the others but listening intently. Everyone seemed relaxed and jovial, as though they were lounging around a campfire.

"Tell me, b'y," said Marcus, "did ya ever work on a movie with Stallone?"

"No, not with Stallone," Doug said, "but I've got a great story about him. I heard it from the sound guy on this Lorezno Lamas movie I worked on."

"Which one?" N-Dig asked.

"Snake Eater 5: Die, Dyson, Die," he answered.

"Ah, yes! A classic," N-Dig said with a laugh.

"Where was I?" Doug asked. "Oh right. The sound guy knew a guy who worked on that Stallone movie where he played a cop. I can't remember which one. It doesn't matter. Anyway, they're on set, right? While the crew is setting up for the next shot, Stallone takes some girl he found into his trailer. She starts, you know, going down on him, and he keeps saying 'cup da balls, cup da balls' in that weird, deep, punch-drunk voice he has. Thing is, he still has his wireless mic on."

The room erupted in uproarious laughter.

"The sound guy heard it, and recorded it. He played it for the whole crew."

The team's laughs got louder and more raucous.

Buff stood behind them all, stone-faced, carefully laying the RDX safely on the ground.

"Wait, it gets better," Doug continued. "One of the grips actually makes up shirts that say 'cup da balls' on them. So, that movie ends, and then months later, the sound guy gets a phone call at six in the morning. Some other sound guy got sick, and they want him to come in last minute. It's all a big rush, so they don't tell him anything about the show other than its name and where the location is. The 'cup da balls' shirt is the only clean thing he has, so he throws it on and drives to set."

"When he gets there, he finds out it's another Stallone movie! He knows he has to change his shirt, but before he can, he bumps into Stallone as he's coming out of his trailer. Like, they literally collide into each other."

"So, Stallone looks down, sees the guy's shirt, and goes, 'I say that,' and then kept walking. 'I say that!' Like it was a 'No Fear' shirt, right? Dude has absolutely no self-awareness at all."

Everyone except Buff laughed again.

The frazzled leader of this team had heard enough.

Without saying a word, he walked into the centre of the room, pulled the Beretta out of his pocket, held it above his head, aimed at the ceiling, and fired.

The thunderous boom startled them all. Marcus jumped out of his seat, and Beka came running in from the hallway. Everyone turned to Buff, and they could see from the expression on his face how outraged he was.