Crash

Crash: Chapter 7

Okay, short A/N: I'm gonna try to lighten the mood a little bit within the next couple of chapters...comment and tell me what you think! It's still going to be serious, though, I prommm but okay I won't keep you, go read .x -Courtney

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 *a few weeks later*

Harry

It's been a while since I've seen Aubrey. She obviously refused to get in touch with me after what happened that night. Who could blame her? I'd tried to forget about her these last few weeks, but it was no use. Every time I wasn't busy, she popped back into my head. Was I really that terrible, that she'd want to completely ignore me? 

Right now, I was on my way to the London Psych Center. Crazy, right? Well, I needed to clear my head. I hadn't felt like going to the clubs lately, because I felt guilty about Aubrey. With the way I left things, I needed to make it right with her. Clubbing probably wasn't the best idea of how to do that. With nothing to occupy my time, I'd been left alone in my flat to think. And drink.

Aubrey was right. I needed to stop. But I couldn't--drinking took my pain away. Sure, it sucked after, but I would do anything to escape the memories, the past. But today was different. 

I would go to the Psych Center, and tell the doctor everything. I had to do this before I changed my mind, too, or it would never happen. I needed help with my problems. I hadn't even gone to see Louis at all for a couple of months.

I was an awful friend. Truly awful. And an awful man, too. I tortured everyone who came into my life, and didn't even have the decency to try to keep them there. I hated myself, it was official. I ruined everything. 

I parked in my assigned number at the LPC, and grabbed my ID card out of the glove box. It was now or never. 

 ***

"Harry! It's wonderful to see you today. What would you like, young man?" Shelley was such a kind woman. She was the receptionist here at the LPC. I hoped someone treated her right, like she deserved.

"Good morning, could I meet with Dr. Atkins, if he isn't busy right now?" I asked, anxiously. I felt like a little kid again, and nearly chewed off my lip from the nerves. Glancing around the room, I noticed there weren't many people here. Only a select few, that looked especially...needy, we'll say. I looked back at Shelley expectantly as she told me to sit in the waiting area across from her desk. 

"Shelley...why aren't there more people here today? It's usually so busy." 
"Well, Mr. Styles, it's the first Monday in May. It's a national holiday, so a lot of people are staying with family, outside of London," she replied sweetly.

Wow, seriously? I was losing my head so bad, I couldn't even keep track of the days. "Oh." was all I could manage to utter back. I walked into the waiting area and took a seat, picking up a few magazines from the rack. Of course. The headlines read:

"Louis Tomlinson: Will He Recover?" and, "Harry Styles, Taking it Hard." another, "Louis and Harry, the Only Two Left."
But, the worst one of all, was this. "The Most Infamous Crash of the Decade--Will Louis Survive?"

Without thinking, I began to tear the magazines to shreds. This was ridiculous. Who were they, to comment on the accident? They were nothing but useless papz, and I was sick of them. They always had to dig up the past. Tears welled in my eyes. I couldn't handle this.

"Oh, sweetie! I'm so sorry!" Shelley cried, running to my assistance. "Here, let me take those." She took the magazines from my hands, ripping them herself and tossing them in the waste bin. I was completely numb, my body unmoving. Tiny trails of water streamed down my face as my senses took over. I forced my eyes closed, letting everything flow back to me.

 *flashback*

It was a great day to be in London. I had the top down on my Rover, enjoying the feeling of the wind in my hair. The One Direction CD blared in my car, and I sung along to my own parts, considering I was the only one in the vehicle. Liam, Zayn, Niall, and Louis were all in the car ahead of me. We were on our way home from a small pub in the corner of London. It was our favorite, (besides Nando's of course) and we didn't get recognized often there, even without disguises. Since Louis and I were the only drivers, we drove seperately. I had plans later to meet up with some old friends from primary school, and I was going immediately after dinner, so I drove alone. 

Louis slowed down, trying to get his car alongside mine. "Aye, wanna race a bit?" I heard a yell from Niall, who was riding in the passenger seat. "Ha, no thanks Nialler, I just got my license! I don't want any trouble from the police!" I yelled back. 

"C'mon mate, not even a little friendly competition?" Louis looked over at me, flashing me a white sparkly smile. His eyes captivated me for a moment, sparkling in the sunlight. "I-er, no, sorry Lou! I'll stay back, you guys race yourselves, eh?" I laughed, uneasy. He made me so nervous sometimes.

"Suit yourself, mate!" Zayn yelled out his window. I could hear Liam screaming in the background, "HELP ME, HAZ!" I shot Li an apologetic look. The poor guy was so responsible, and was not taking this lightly. 

"Try not to kill yourselves, will you? I don't feel like attending any funerals any time soon!" I screamed, laughing. I looked in Louis's direction, as he exclaimed, "We'll be off, have fun at your mate's house, we love our little Haz to death!" He winked at me, and sped off.

God, did that hurt me.

I watched Louis and the boys drive off into the dusk. A traffic light turned yellow up ahead, and I slowed down. The boys began to fade out of my vision. The light then turned red. Suddenly, I heard a loud noise from in font of me. A booming noise sounded, and I scanned the road. Please. I thought. Not them. I sped up, forgetting the law for a moment. I could hear sirens in the distance, nearing this spot. 

Louis's car.

I stopped my car in the middle of the road. Everything else that was on my mind disappeared. All I could think about was Louis. The other boys, too, but mainly Lou. I loved him. I loved him so much, and never even had the chance to really show him. "LOUIS!" I screamed, not noticing the tears dripping on my shirt. I sprinted through the intersection, running right up to his car. "Louis, please!!" I opened the door immediately and dragged him out onto the pavement, kneeling next to him. "Louis, look at me. Please. Please tell me you're okay. I need you!!" I screamed. I shook Louis's body. "Come on, Lou, wake up!" Pressing my ear to his chest, I listened for a heartbeat. 

Thank God.

"Come on Lou, come on. You can do this. Stay with me." I whispered. "I NEED SOME HELP HERE!" I yelled to anyone willing to listen. From somewhere, a voice responded that an ambulance was on its way.  I was numb. I couldn't feel anything, even unaware that I was crying erratically. 

I left Louis where he was, and quickly got the other boys out of the car as well. None of the others were breathing. No, no, no. This wasn't real. It couldn't be real. I let out an agonizingly painful yell, a raspy cry of desperation leaving my lips. I fell to my knees next to Louis. I crawled to him, pulling him into my arms. Shallow, jagged breaths were all I could manage. "Come on Louis. I love you. Don't go. Don't go. Please." I rocked back and forth in the middle of the intersection. I blocked out the world around me. I was traumatized.

I brushed Louis's face with my hand. I couldn't lose him. I absolutely could not. His sparkling blue eyes. I would give anything I had to see them sparkle in the sun again. 

I felt Louis's body being torn away from me by what I presumed was a medical technician. Red lights flashed nearby, and the sky grew dark. I stayed on the pavement, rocking myself to stay calm. Paparrazzi began to close in on the scene of the crash, trying to find out all of the details. I'm sure multiple pictures would be posted and numerous stories would be rumoured by the end of the night. Flashes of light forced me to shut my eyes in the hopes of shutting them out. 

"Three of five victims...pronounced dead on the scene...may or may not be...One Direction."  I could hear various reports being told to local news channels on the sidewalks near me. Someone came over and knelt beside me. "Okay sweetie. Come with me. Let's get you a towel and wipe your eyes, eh? And maybe a glass of water will do you some good, too," an attractive, older woman consoled. She gave me her hand, and I took it emotionlessly and without words. She led me to the ambulance, pulling at my hand lightly. She reassured me, but it was for nothing. Nothing could bring them back. And nothing could take me back in time to the moments before this. 

 *present*

I woke up in a room unfamiliar to me. Where was I? I rolled over, and saw the bright colors on the walls. I was at LPC. "Ahh, you're finally awake! How are you feeling?" Dr. Atkins walked into my room, a genuine smile on his face.

"What happened? I was just in the waiting room a bit ago..." I asked. "You saw those magazines...and had a panic attack. By the time I got there, you were sitting on the floor, screaming and crying, your head buried in your knees. I've never seen you that way before," he answered. I tried to look at anything but him. I was ashamed, embarrassed.

"We admitted you to the ward. You can stay here as long as you need to, and we can talk anytime you'd like. No questions asked. We'll try to keep paparazzi out of it the best we can. Is there anyone who may like to visit you while you're here?" He asked.

"Um...maybe. Her name is Aubrey. I haven't spoken to her recently, but it's worth a shot." Uneasily, I said this. Maybe I shouldn't have. I fidgeted around in the bed. "Care to share with me?" The doctor laughed. "Eventually, Doc." I managed a little smile, to which he responded, "Understood."

"Thank you, Dr." I said. This man had done so much for me in the last 7 months. I couldn't thank him enough times for his generosity toward me. "It's nothing, Harry. Take all the time you need. Just press that little blue button on the remote if you'd like to see me." He got up and left the room, leaving me to think.

I hoped she'd come back to me. I hoped she would save me.

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OKAYYYY GUYS SO. This was a bit crazy, and if you cried, I'm so super sorry!! Please know this is purely fiction and I would never wish this upon One Direction, EVER. So, do you think Aubrey will visit him? Commenters get to be held in Harry's arms while he tells you he loves you. And if you want to fix broken Harry, votes will do the trick! Aubrey will be back next chapter, I prommmise. Love all of my followers and readers :) .x -Courtney