Just Friends | A Joe Jonas Fanfiction

Chapter 19

He stared at his hands, trying to find his words. Why was he taking so long to answer? Ann's heart started to beat faster as she realized her prediction to this conversation may have been correct. She got played.

"Can you just say something already?" She said, getting a little impatient.

He sighed and looked up to her. His eyes were wet, a single drop of tear falling from his cheek. He took her hands and gave her a weak smile.

"Whatever it is you want to say, I can take it." She reassured him, while wiping the tear from his cheek.

"I don't want to hurt you." He finally said almost in a whisper.

"Why would you hurt me?"

"I tend to do that. I tend to run away from relationships, when things start to get serious." He looked away, ashamed of his words. "I'm afraid of commitment."

"Are you ready to talk to me about Sophie now?" She put a hand in his curls and rubbed his head gently.

"Your mom?" He frowned.

"Oh my god." She chuckled. "Your ex."

"You know about her?"

"Of course I know, Joe." She rolled her eyes. "You were the it couple. Everyone talked about you."

"She was... She was the first girl I saw myself settling in with. She changed me. She made me fight for her and not run away like I always did. That's why I proposed to her. Because she was different." He sighed. "But while planning the wedding and having conversations about kids I realized that I didn't really want this. I wasn't ready for that."

"So you ran away again?"

"I didn't. I really wanted it to work out, so I did everything I could to fix it. But it was too late. We fought almost every day, shredding everything we built together over the year. And then I caught her talking to a friend next to a ring camera. She said a lot of stuff there that made me realize that it's over. She said that I'm pathetic and that she regrets meeting me." He started to tear up. Those words really hurt him and they still did.

"I'm so sorry. I had no idea." She took his hand and rubbed it with her thumb.

"Hearing those words from a person you love the most was like a knife straight into the heart. So I promised myself I'm done with relationships. I'm done with love. I got lost. I met up with girls, had sex and never talked to them again. It was like a revenge for what she did to me. I wanted to hurt every girl I encountered. It was... destructive. She quickly got into a new relationship and I was stuck, not able to move on."

Ann looked down, trying to comprehend all that he said. So she was right. She was a toy for him in all of this sick revenge act. Tears started to fill her eyes and she was about to say something when he continued his monologue.

„And then I met you." She looked up to him, seeing his face lit up a little. A weak smile formed on his lips. „At first I admit, all I wanted was to get you in my bed. But after our first talk in that conference room... you were something I was looking forward to every day. Someone I felt the need to protect at all cost. To not let anyone or anything hurt you, including me. I realized that you were the missing part of me that I was looking for for so long to close the previous chapter in my life."

Ann let out a little laugh through tears. She couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Joe, I-"

"Let me finish." He grabbed her hands and looked her deep in her eyes. "I need you in my life. Every second without you feels like forever and I can't loose you. That's why I'm so afraid to call this a thing. I'm afraid that if we don't work out I'll just loose you forever."