End Game: My Brother, My Friend.... My Lover?

DOYOUNG

         "Such a baby! Aigoo, keure, just say you need my body as bolster."  Yet he always gives in to my little favors.

         "Stop bitching already. If I know you also love hugging me, duh." I rolled my eyes to tease him.

        "Yeah right, whatever! You're just exploiting my kindness when you're heartbroken. I bet when Jeongwoo hyung comes back- " he quickly stopped whatever he's about to say when he probably saw the change in my facial expression.

        "Y-yah, dobby-a sorry. I'm just teasing you!" I pretended to be offended and kept mum while I still fixed my eyes on him.

       'Actor Dobby mode on. Serves you right for teasing me.'  He quickly jumped into bed beside me and coaxed me gently really believing I'm hurt.

        "Dobby-a, bianhe, I'm just teasing you. You know that I'm always here for you. Don't be mad anymore please?"  I scooted farther so he can properly lie down comfortably. As he engulfed me in a bear hug, I slowly relaxed in his arms, pressing my head on his chest.

        "Ah cham, Rora came back with me after our shoot. She said she loved to hangout more with us. She's been trying to join us everytime we play ping pong. Are up for it? How about this weekend? Hm?"

       "Hmm, it's fine with me. She's cute too and I do feel comfortable with her." I couldn't dare open my eyes and be welcome with his veiny neck and having the VIP view of his muscled pecs. Junghwan's natural manly scent isn't helping too. It's too intoxicating and I'm confused if I should regret asking him to cuddle or suppress these tingling feelings and indulged in his warmth which I badly needed at the moment.

         Ever since this kid came of age and grew up in bullet speed during the peak of his puberty, I couldn't help but notice him in a different light. I tried. Tried so hard to treat him as my dongsaeng like before, since I felt regretful judging him due to the pressure of the competition during ygtb.

        He's the youngest and most of us felt threatened especially when YG Sassangnim noticed him. Now I fully understand why, Junghwan's presence screams charisma and Superstar. With his physique and visuals, any gender will be magnetized.

        I never noticed he already fell asleep if not because of that cute little snore he's doing that vibrates on my head. God bless my soul tonight, praying I would survive the torture. His breaths fan my forehead and he smells like mint from his toothpaste.

       I decided to untangle myself to escape the torture but the brat just tightened his arms more brushing his groin with my bum out of surprise.

       He pulled me upward and press his face on my nape feeling more his warm breath, sending chills on my spine. I needed to escape, if not I will regret it tomorrow if I couldn't control myself from whimpering from his effect.

      "Junghwan-a, I need to go the bathroom, hm?" I tapped his hand on my tummy, since the tingling effect already travelled fast to every nerves of my body. I needed to escape asap.

      "Mmm, come back quickly, I need my stuff bunny to sleep" he mumbled while half awake.

        I hurriedly bolted out of bed and lock myself in the bathroom. It took me a few minutes to calm myself down and I washed my face to cool my burning skin.

        'Get a grip of yourself Kim Doyoung! Rmember you just broke up with Jeongwoo a few months ago. Junghwan doesn't deserve to be your rebound just because you miss  being fucked! Can you afford losing him too?'  Plus he had a girlfriend for God's sake!

        Aniya! I can't gamble my friendship with Junghwan for just temporary physical gratification. He's more than that. I would rather stay as his best friend forever rather than indulging my hormones and lost him. He's too important to me and honestly I can't imagine my life without him.

        I went out to the porch after fixing myself some warm water from the kitchen.

        The cold air of Seoul hinting the coming of Winter Season. Woo will be back next week, just in time for his birthday and the start of our rehearsals for the final Treasure Concert. The impending separation is inevitable and the weight on my chest keeps getting heavier. 

         I didn't noticed any movement behind me with my eyes closed and mixed thoughts and emotions. I jolted a little when I felt a sudden grip in my shoulders. Which turned to a back hug giving a familiar warmth made me relax.

        "What are you doing here outside? It's freezing."

        I closed my eyes and leaned back on him as I collected my thoughts.

       "Mmm, just couldn't sleep. I got some warm water." Raising the mug I was holding.

        "I woke up when I felt your side of the bed empty. Then the bathroom lights are off so I came looking for you."

        He turned me around and face him. With his ginormous palm encasing my face, I have no choice but to look directly in his eyes.  'God! This man will be the death of me'

        "Is everything alright Dobby? I usually don't want to pry but I've noticed you're a little prickly lately even with me." He's being careful with his words and I felt guilty for being to sensitive and caught up with my emotions and mental battle.

       "Bianhe hwan-a, I just have a lot of things in my mind lately. I know I'm being hot and cold lately.... I-.. I just -.." I choked on my words and he pulled me gently for a hug.

     "Sssshhhh, guimanhe, uljima. Sorry for asking. I know you're still on the process of moving on and the pressure with your parents overwhelmed you." He continuously rubbing my back gently as I finally let go of my pent up emotions in a soft sob.

       Mixed emotions. That's how I truly felt. As much as I love the comfort Junghwan is giving me right now, I can't deny it adds to the weight of the things I tried to suppress. But at the same time, his presence gives me the motivation to work hard and not think of Jeongwoo. Especially at night.

       "You can stay with me for as long as you want dobs, besides this place is more than enough for the both of us. Plus, my Mom would be delighted to know it's you whom I'm rooming with. She knows you take care of me as much as she does."  A little add up in boosting my ego is the fact that Junghwan's mom really does like me. I wonder if she likes Sowon too. Did he introduce Sowon to his Mom?

        "By the way hwan, has your mom met Sowon already?" Though it's a spur of the moment thought, it really does triggered my curiosity to know.

        There was an awkward silence for a while. I didn't expect that. I wasn't updated whether the topic on Sowon hits a sour spot.

       "You don't have to answer me if it's uncomfortable for you. I wasn't aware of your relationship updates these past months, sorry I'm such a lousy friend."  He suddenly pinched my left cheek which caught me by surprise.

        "Ouch! Yaah that hurts!" I slapped his hand away but of course he's stronger and I was held back in a tight rope  a.k.a. Junghwan's bulk arms.

        "We broke up. I broke up with her actually."

   ~ Page 11 ~