Stress relief

Study

"You are a useless ungrateful brat. Look at this. 99 out of 100 because of your cursed handwriting," Mother yelled at me as I looked down at the paper. The answer was the correct one but I had cried and my tears had landed on the paper smudging the word. I said nothing as Mother kept on yelling calling me every word there was to hurt me before dragging me to the dining room table and pushing me in a chair. In front of me was a stack of lined paper and a book."Now you sit here and study so you can be more than just a disappointment and waste of space," Mother scolded. I picked up the pen and paper so I could start writing the biology book the subject in which I got 99 on the last test. I had read and written the entire thing 4 times by now. I didn't even have to open it to write it down, but I did to please Mother. I was tired. I didn't sleep at all last night because I knew I would get the results today. Mother walked up behind me to make sure I did my work. She loomed over me staring me down waiting for a chance to yell at me. We both heard the front door open and I knew Father had returned. "I'm home," He called. Mother walked to him and showed him my test. He stormed in and yelled at me."WE ONLY ASK ONE THING OF YOU THAT YOU KEEP UP YOUR SCHOOLING DO YOU THINK THAT YOUR FOOD TOYS AND CLOTHING ARE FREE? WE PAY FOR IT AND THIS IS THE THANKS WE GET? A SMUGED WORD? AMAYA YOU CAN AND WILL DO BETTER THAN THIS. WE BROUGHT YOU TO THIS WORLD SO AT LEAST SHOW SOME APPRECIATION FOR IT," He yelled at me slamming the test on the table. I said nothing. I truly believe it would have been better if they hadn't. I just continued to study. "I don't know what we are gonna do with this girl. She studies day and night yet always fails. Why can't she be more like Dan? He is raised in a dysfunctional home yet always does better than her," Mother said in another room. Dan was 3 years older than me. I had already been bumped up a few grades. It hurts I am better than him but they can't see that. I know I am better than this but at the same time, they never see this. All they see is my failures they didn't even notice that my answer was right they don't even notice that I cry every night they don't see the shit they don't see anything by my mistakes. They don't see that I sneak painkillers to deal with my never-ending stomach aches or that my hair is falling out. No of course they see they must have a reason for yelling at me. Maybe I am just a failure. Father walked in and looked at me with a glare."Do you have homework?" He asked. I nodded."Then go do that once done continue to study. You apparently slacked off during your school breaks," He told me. I did as told and brought my homework into the dining room. The rest was packed away as I started on the assignments. One for each class I was a part of. I got one every day for every subject. I worked until dinner was served and even then I wasn't allowed to stop. I had to work while I ate. 

Except that today I couldn't swallow. I just couldn't get it down. I tried but it wanted to get back up. Mother and Father looked at me for once not with disappointment or disapproval but with concern. I just couldn't swallow. I wasn't hungry but I knew I had to eat. I eventually threw up on the floor. I hadn't had lunch as I wasn't hungry so there barely was anything in my system. Both mother and father rushed to me.

"You should have told us that you were ill," Mother said with worry in her voice. I said nothing. They tugged me into my bed and got a thermometer. Father brought a desk that he set up over my body so I could still do my homework while sick. Mother took my temperature."You don't have a fever," She said. I said nothing as Father brought my homework. "If you are faking then there will be consequences," He said. I just couldn't answer."What is there left to take?" It slipped out. He looked at me."What did you say?" He asked. I had tears streaming down as I looked at both of them Mother had just arrived with food and a bucket. "I have no friends no social life no personal items no clothing that isn't a school uniform no hobbies no interest no self-esteem no hair no childhood no life no time no sleep. What do I have left that can be taken from me?" I asked him if I really wanted to in reality I said nothing staying quiet. He looked at me and then started yelling. Mother just glared as both of them took turns scolding me. Food was shoved into my mouth and My body just rejected it as I threw up in the bucket. "I don't think she is faking," Mother said. Father growled."Finish your homework and go to sleep. We are taking you to a doctor tomorrow," Mother said as both left. I looked up. It would properly be better if I just died. No one would miss me either way. Mother and Father both hate me and have cut off all the friends I used to have. They did this when I came home and asked if I could attend a birthday. Apparently, that took away from my study time so their solution was to ban me from having friends and even contacting other parents to make sure it didn't happen again. I started on my work again and eventually passed out.