Saving Bucky Barnes

Chapter 21

I sighed as I again walked down the hall. Today was "Mental training". Whatever that meant. In all honesty I was scared. Not so scared for myself, but for Bucky. Every time I closed my eyes, I remembered the mental torture he had been through. I realized the more I thought about Bucky, the less I thought about my problems. My fears were nothing compared to what he had gone through. I realized how little I really knew about Bucky. I knew nothing of his family, years at Hydra, or even his feelings. Normally I could just look in his eyes and read his emotions, but it was different to hear the words. I looked to my left. I has shocked and scared. Bucky had his head low and his eyes betrayed the lie he had told me. Everything was not ok. Bucky was one of the bravest people I know and the person who most deserves to be afraid. But Bucky was worried and that was not a good sign.

We entered a different room then yesterday. It was too dark to make out much. I felt in the darkness until I found Bucky's hand. He had always been my strength but little had I realized that I also needed to be his. I needed to change. I couldn't spend the rest of my days here doing nothing but feeling sorry for myself and leaning against Bucky. I lifted my chin in determination. I wasn't going down without a fight. I was tired of playing the weakling that could be controlled. It was time to fight back. The agent that had given us orders yesterday appeared.

Hello again. I realized that yesterday I failed to explain why Hydra was doing this. We have been watching you both over the last few days and have deemed you worthy of-

Oh how kind of you. And here I was worried that Hydra didn't like us. My voice dripped with sarcasm as I interrupted her.

She seemed momentarily stupefied. But only for a moment. Her hand shot out and smacked me across the face so hard that I fell to the floor.

I realize that you think you are above us, but let me tell you something. I am the boss here. You will listen to me and take orders from me. I will not be sassed to by a little twit. Now as I was saying. She paused as I got up.

Bucky held out a hand and I got up. He did not release my hand. His eyes cautiously strayed to mine and he looked searchingly. I however, kept my face void of all emotion. I could handle a little pain. He shouldn't feel the need to protect me.

Now as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted. Hydra has deemed you both worthy. We have seen the Winter Soldier in action before but he has seemed less focused now that you are here. However, we notice he works better cooperatively when you are with him. He has undergone training such as this in the past, however, he remembers nothing. Just like we wanted him to. He did not respond well under this training last time. We are willing to try again with you working with him. We have noticed your skills are very good. I see you have been training. Hydra thinks that you could be our greatest asset. Even greater, perhaps, then the Winter Soldier. Hydra has offered you the job but you refused. However, we are sure you will come around. After all, we have some ways of persuasion. Of course, if our wiping machine was working, we would not be having this conversation. You would already be on a mission as we speak. But we have to use other means of training. We are however close to a breakthrough in that area. Back to the point. You are about to go through mental training. This entire month will be devoted to training an cultivating your many skills. It will be mentally, physically, and emotionally painful. This isn't playtime. You will do this together but not always as a team. Today you will enter a virtual reality. A holographic world, or several as you will soon see. You will be placed in several life threatening situations, each in a different time or place. The goal is to see how well you react under extreme pressure. You will not always work together or appear in the situation as yourself. In order to move on, one of you must die. You will not really die of course. However, it will seem real. The person who dies, leaves that level with a wound that is real. A reminder. You will continue until I decide to stop. At first you will want to be heroic and brave, but you will wear down and your skills will not be as strong. You will see soon of course. She said.

Wow. If you had gone on much longer, I would have fallen asleep. I could have figured it out better if you had just turned on the program and let me deal with it. I said.

Next time I will. She growled.

Bucky gripped my hand.

We are ready. I said.

She flipped a switch and the darkness disappeared.