You fill my lungs and take away the air [Global Examination]

Chapter 15: Inside your holographic heart

154 wasn't sure what he expected when he woke up, his throat smoldering as flowers and petals ripped at his insides, tearing him from the inside out, to find some way, any way, to escape from the confines of his body... only to be greeted to an eyeful of 922's exposed throat.

The dumbass was drooling onto his other pillow, but 154 was already fully used to 922's sleeping habits, so this wasn't too unexpected. 922 was a cuddly person by nature, even in his sleep, so it wasn't that surprising either when 154 tried to get up and found that he couldn't due to a strong, firm arm wrapped around his waist gently, unintentionally trapping him against 922's side.

922 swallowed in his sleep, and 154 watched as that Adam's apple bobbed up and down along 922's neck, feeling himself flushing all the way to his neck. He froze and blinked as the taller man tilted his head slightly, lightly nuzzling 154 with his cheek, before drifting back to sleep contently, completely dead to the world.

...

154 felt like throwing up.

Not because of sweet, gentle 922, but because his chest was tightening, his heart pounding, his throat sore and itching with bloodied flowers, his lungs seizing as the roots buried themselves even further into his being-

154 didn't want to let go of this warmth, this care and kindness that he had been craving so desperately, just the tiniest bit of reassurance that he was alright, that he wasn't digging his own grave and hanging himself with the unraveled spool of his heart decorated with bloody purple flowers, a deadly necklace of his own making, and that, ultimately, he had shackled himself with his own bid for freedom, amidst this sea of absolute nothingness.

The warmth that reminded him even if 154 had nothing, was nothing, if his existence was just as meaningless and worthless as the System that thought itself to be an omniscient god, yet with a world view as shallow and narrow as a tiny puddle that formed after a rainstorm, reflecting a distorted image of humanity...

It was alright, it didn't matter, and everything would be okay, because there was still someone out there that still... cared about him.

Him, 154, someone who shouldn't be alive, something that shouldn't even exist, something that was undeserving of all of this love and affection and-

922 let out a startlingly loud snore, and 154's eyes stung, his chest felt tight, feeling choked up as more and more petals forced their way up his throat.

Letting out a weak cough, and praying he still had the strength to hold it in, 154 gently pried 922's too-warm hands off him and carefully wiggled out of his grasp, not wanting to wake 922 up.

He didn't think he could explain why he needed to use the bathroom, not when petals were threatening to spill from his lips should he even open his mouth, let alone try to speak, and that wasn't discreet in the slightest...

Using the wall and bedframe for support, 154 cautiously creeped over 922's body, and the second his feet touched the solid floor, he booked it to the bathroom, locking the door behind him-

And spewed petals everywhere; over the sink counter, onto the floor, and all 154 could feel was a constant pang in his heart, a searing pain in his chest, as he slammed his hand over his mouth, hoping to at least muffle the sounds so he wouldn't wake 922 up.

He shouldn't have to see this, 922 didn't have to see this-

Tears were forming, leaking from the corners of his eyes as his coughing fit slowly subsided, and 154 could only wonder how the flowers had grown back so quickly, with such ferocity, when he had quite literally just cut them out of his lungs-