My Life With Billie Joe Armstrong

Chapter 11

I lay on my bed as Billie, Mike and Tre played 'Wake Me Up When September Ends'. I sat quietly, listening to it.

As my memory rests, but never forgets what I lost, wake me up, when September Ends...

I had a crazy thought and went to the bathroom, picking up Billie's razor and pulling the sharp piece of metal out, holding it carefully. I'd read somewhere that once you start to self harm, it's hard to stop. Who would even give a shit? Billie? Nah. No-one would. I held the blade to my skin and took a deep breath as I dragged it across. Pain, but more than that, I felt relief. I did it again, and again, until they were all up my arm. Fuck. I washed it carefully, and the razor, and put it back so he wouldn't know. I left the bathroom and went to my room, putting a hoodie over my short sleeved top. Common sense. Mike and Tre said their goodbyes and left.

*next day*

It was after Art that my favourite teacher, Mrs Prescott, asked me to help clean up the brushes. I agreed happily, and went around the empty classroom collecting them in and took them to the sink. We rolled our sleeves up and began to wash them. I heard her gasp suddenly.

"Natalie... Your arm..." I felt the blood leave my head.

"Please don't tell anyone. It was a mistake, I won't do it again, I swear. I wasn't thinking straight." I blabbered, and she hugged me.

"It's okay," She said softly, and we kept cleaning up and then it was home time. I got home and Billie was on the phone.

'Uh huh, okay, yeah, no' was all he seemed to be able to say. He put the phone down and looked at me in the eyes.

"Natalie?" I looked at him.

"Yeah?"

"Can I... see your arm?"

My heart stopped.