By sunset, the ceremony had ended and the festivities had begun. Elranduil and Ardúin were married. All of Eryn Galen would look to me to find my wife amidst the ladies of the court not yet taken.
I sat alone by a window above the throne room watching the sun fall behind the Misty Mountains—casting dark shadows like the point of daggers towering over the forest below. I would not admit even to myself that I wanted someone by my side. I put the thought out of my mind as I heard the laughter and joyous conversations as indiscernible chatter. Soon I saw four figures walking up the winding staircase toward me.
"Why are you here, Thranduil," Sildôr asked his brother by his side. With them were Fëaluin and Fínduin. "You should be with Elranduil and the rest of us."
"My heart is with them," I said. "That should be enough. As it is, I feel far removed from such things. I am not like you. Having found someone. I am not looking but I would be far out of place tonight. Why are you here, if I may ask?"
"Well, there was a worry for you," he said. Concern from Nínorë. She said you were sullen during the ceremony and asked me to see to your well-being."
I looked at my friends. Every one of them had changed to the point they were unrecognizable to me. As I was to answer, I saw Melros, Aramír, and Aramoth walking up the stairs with Elmîr not far behind.
"I see you have found him," Melros said, smiling. "Even I was worried. Are you well, Thranduil?"
"Yes," I growled. "I am doing rather well considering."
"Considering what," Fínduin asked as he sat next to me. "We have not seen you for weeks and when I catch a glance, you barely acknowledge me."
"I have had many things duties I had to undertake to prepare for this day," I lied. "I apologize for my absence."
"Thranduil, your only responsibility was to give Elranduil the ring he placed on Ardúin's finger," he said looking concerned. "That is not the reason why you have hidden from us."
I glanced at Melros. He knew what bothered me.
"May I have a word with Thranduil," he asked keeping his gaze upon me. "Fëaluin and Elmîr, stay. Sildôr, assure Nínorë that all is well. We shall join you later."
The others nodded and left quietly and slowly. One by one, they disappeared from view. When they were gone, Melros looked at me sternly.
"This is about us, is it not," he asked. "You are angry with us all, I have known you since childhood. I know how you become when things are not as you would like."
"And how would I like them to be, Melros," I asked angrily. "For I fail to see what I could want?"
"Love," Fëaluin said abruptly. "You want to find love."
"That is ridiculous. Why would I want something I find beneath me."
"Because you do," Elmîr said softly. "If you found it as foolish as you have said, then Elranduil's happiness should not bother you. Or what we found. Aramoth has yet to find anyone. He can behave as silly as you do over it."
"I am not being silly," I said standing up and heading further upwards to the towers, my friends following close behind. I walked over to the balcony overlooking the treetops that in the rising of the moon had become black as the shadows they cast upon one another.
"What has come over you if not a need for love," Melros asked.
"None of you will ever know. Not even Elranduil. I am as I am because I cannot find what you can. My time is something not my own. My life is not my own. I cannot go a day without someone watching what I do or what I say. The world has to know which maiden will become my wife because someday she will be my queen. I do not have the time to be foolish and lost in whatever emotion you have when you are with Árendil. Or Aryávë. Or with Linurial. I am focused on one thing and that is to prepare to rule this kingdom one day and whosoever rules beside me is not for love. Even I should not be expected to spend my eternity with someone I cannot love. Much less love me in return. Is it me? Perhaps I cannot be loved."
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Book II: The Saga of Thranduil
Fanfiction"I am Thranduil, I was born to rule." The Saga of Thranduil has been called many things by those that have read it--from Fan Fiction to a Continuation of the stories of Middle Earth given to us by the legendary author J.R.R. Tolkien. It is the story...