Why am I feeling this way? (Satoru×Suguru JJK fanfiction)

CHAPTER V.

SATORU POV:
I had enough. I just rushed back to the bus stop, putted my earphones back on and waited. The only thing...actually person I was thinking about was Suguru. This wasn't what I wanted but it was the best option. But when I got home, I started overthinking about every other things I could say there. Fuck...I putted off my hoodie and my shirt and layd on my bed. "I didn't even get the bandage.." I though out loud. I wanted to sleep..but I still couldn't. It was currently about 2PM and I still didn't relax on my day off..Then, I heard a knock on my door. I didn't want to answer but it was rude to not to. I came to the door and opened it, on the other side..there was him. Suguru..

SUGURU POV:
I wanted to meet him and fix things up so I came to his room. It was still the same one as he had as a child. I knocked on it and a few moments later, he opened. I scanned him and saw, that he doesn't have a shirt or anything on his top. Fuck his body was so pretty.. but I needed to concentare on the plan, although my face was red as fuck. "Satoru...I um..I know you don't want to even see me again in your life but..please...let me try.." after all that I said..he started thinking for some time but then opened the door wide. "Fine..but wait a second" he said in a quite worried tone. "If your room is messy, I don't care about that" I tried to be loud enough so he would hear me.
I heard some drawers and more of furniture as he was probably cleaning something. I silently went in a closed the door after me. I got to his room a second after he putted a long sleeved shirt on. "If you're wearing that because of me...you can put it off..it's..fine.." not gonna lie..I wanted for him to put it off...for some reason I didn't understand. "Nevermind..um..sorry..You..forgot your shades there.." I handed the shades I way holding the entire time to him. He took it quickly but not that fast, that I couldn't notice that his hand was shaking. I wanted to help..and this was the time I was trying. He pointed at an armchair that he had. "Take a seat.." he said coldly. I looked at him as he putted his shades back on and I sat down. "Satoru...I know that..the thing I did..hurted you. I can see that in the moment I look at you..You're all sad now..and I didn't see you smile the whole time and that...I don't know why.." I said and I started tearing up..this wasn't my Best friend..technically, he was but it was a whole different person.."Geto, people change. I already said that." He sighed..I wanted to comfort him "Satoru look..I know that I hurted you but I want to make things right..please..let me be your friend again..We were the unbeatable duo back then. Is there a chance that we can be it again?" I voice was shaky..he looked at me..I went silent. "Why are you even back?..You wanted them all to die..why are you back?" He asked me..I couldn't tell him that all this was a misunderstanding so I walked up to him and sat on the bed next to him "Don't worry about that" I putted my hand on his shoulder. I noticed that his cheeks were..a little red..was it embarrassment or something else? I didn't know. Mine were red as hell and even if I tried to make them normal, I couldn't. He looked at my eyes and he said: "Geto...I'm not mad at you or something..I just don't think I will be able to be friends with you..I just..I don't know how to say it.." "Satoru..it's fine..I know that I hurted you..and I'm sorry..really..really sorry. I didn't think how that would affect you back then. I was selfish..I'm sorry Satoru.." a tear rolled out of my eye..he wiped it off..it was a sudden change of emotion. I went red..

SATORU POV:
I didn't know why..but I wanted to talk to him. Even if it wasn't right..I had to. "Geto...okay..we can..be friends or how did you say that..." I said nervously. Something inside me was telling me to run away and go kill myself right now but on the other hand..I wanted to stay and talk to him...

———–《END OF CHAPTER V.》————