In the Blink of Prose

Sweet But Psycho

Trips to the hospital were one of my routines when I was a child. Doctors examined me and found me odd. I was different from normal kids. They said I was unique. They said that my uniqueness was like a broken vase that needs to be fixed.

They tried to fix me, but they couldn't. I could still remember them telling my parents that I would never be a normal person, or live a normal life.

As I grew older, the people around me were really different. They have those emotions: happiness, sadness, and even anger. But I never felt those. Deep inside I know that I was hollow and empty. I was an incomplete puzzle.

Primary school was one of the hardest times. I was bullied because of my 'oddness'. They would throw papers at me, whisper when I passed by, and even get me into trouble so that the Teachers would throw me in detention.

Despite this, my parents remained strong. They cared, supported, and loved me. Especially my mother who always tells me that it's going to be alright. My mother said that I was not odd. She said that I was like her when she was a child too. She knows the feeling of being hollow inside and that feeling of isolation. She said that one day, I would meet someone special. Someone that could fill my void and make me feel complete.

Even though my parents reassured me, I was still empty. I witnessed how they struggled. This is when I decided to force myself to be normal like everyone else.

It worked! But it was all fake.

My parents were finally happy because I had now changed from nothing to a normal kid. But I knew that they could see through my facade. They knew but did not say anything. Instead, they went with the flow, to finally have a normal, happy family like others.

In school, I tried hard to pretend also. When I changed, everything followed. I started to befriend other people, I pretended to care for and support them. Eventually, I was pretending to be normal almost every hour of every day. Yet, it was still fake. Everything was with lies and facades.

I began to desire those emotions I never had. I tried to feel something even those extreme emotions such as guilt and regret after killing two of our neighbor's cats. I wanted to feel something. But still, nothing happened.

I once again remembered my mother's words that one day there would be someone who would complete me. I thought about it all the time, looking forward to each day, and wondering when it would come.

Last year in high school came. Now, I'm in my senior year.

This is when I.... found him.

John of Class 4-A.

We've been schoolmates for years, but it was just that fine day when our roads crossed. At that instant, unfamiliar feelings enveloped and exploded in my system: euphoria and love above all.

Days after that I followed him secretly anywhere he goes. I must protect him. I must make him mine and not let anyone take him. I need him, I want him. He's my completion, he's worth any sacrifice.

My parents will now be proud of me, right?

An incomplete puzzle has now found the final piece.

I am now a sweet masterpiece.