Never Ever ~ Ciara
Rayana and Monte were in his room sitting in complete silence. Monte was debating on ending everything with Ray because she felt like they weren't getting anywhere. Sure, he got back in contact with her, but she doesn't want to get her hopes up for something that's clearly not going to happen. They went on dates and still no status. They talk all the time and support each other and still no status. They have some good times together and still nothing! Maybe he doesn't wanna get serious because he's just got out of a relationship or what not, but she doesn't want to waste anymore time.
"I know I haven't been the best before and-"
"I'm over everything from back then, Monte. That doesn't concern me anymore,"
"But like...isn't it awkward?"
"Not anymore. You don't engage in it anymore, so you're fine. It's good to see you have changed since then,"
"Okay. Well, I think imma just stop this here,"
"Huh?"
"Ray, we keep doing relationship shit and nothing is coming out of it. And I get you're single and stuff now, but I don't know what else to do. So, imma stop now before my feelings get too deep into it like before. Without all of the drama of course, but I just need to-"
"But I like having you around,"
"Exactly...but yet and still we aren't a thing. I can't call us friends. That makes no sense,"
"I get that. Uh...do you wanna be together?"
"I do. I'm not going to force no one to be with me. I'm just saying, like, what do we call each other? Do you wanna work something out? I wouldn't mind, but it's all on the man, really,"
"No it's not-"
"Yes it is. Relationships are stable if two work together, but it's even better if the guy is more into it realistically,"
"Who said that?"
"Well, it's obvious. Guys are the one who ask us out and ask to marry us and stuff. Ya have initiative and everything so...if you are more into it, then I'm more happy and it keeps growing,"
"But what if you're unhappy?"
"Then I let you know to see if we can still work it out, but it depends,"
"On what?"
"Ray, just answer my question. Do you wanna go further or no? You can be honest. I've been rejected before, so I'm cool," she said, shrugging her shoulders.
"Like I said before, I like having you around and I've been having fun with you, but I don't know if I can take you seriously,"
"Okay...well, that's cool I'll just be heading out now,"
"That's it?"
"I mean, yeah. What else you want me to say? You don't take me serious and I'm leaving,"
"Monte, sometimes you just over share things,"
"Of course when I rarely have people to talk to. And I haven't really been on the media like that anyways for the past few weeks. I said I was working on it,"
"Yeah, but you know you can talk to me,"
"You rarely respond. I'm not gonna force you to respond. Plus, I have a group chat with my girls anyways, I'm good," she said as she was walking towards the door.
"Wait,"
"What?"
"I just...I just don't wanna rush anything,"
"We've known each other for years. It won't hurt to learn each other a bit more since it's been a while, but you said you can't take me seriously, so I'm fine. I'm good! If you can't take me serious, then we shouldn't be fucking!"
"Wait-"
"No! It's just the hard truth that imma have to accept! You come back in my life and I make an effort to see you and shit and we end up doing the same shit as before. Picking up where we left off. Now, we're going out a little bit more and shit and having all these talks, chilling with each other, talking on the phone and stuff, but now I can't be taken seriously. I've already been through enough, okay? I haven't had a relationship in years and here I am still struggling to date and keep a guys attention for more than a day! That is extremely hard. I tried altering myself to fit someone's image! I've tried to change some things around so I seem less annoying or whatever. I've done it all. So, I've just been my true self and it still gets me no where. I know what I want, Rayana! I know exactly what I want! Love! You had it, my ex had it, my grandparents had it, my peers had it! Why can't I have it? Huh? Why is it so fucking hard to love me? You've done some stupid shit and I haven't held it against you not once! But...it's okay. I'm just tired of being alone and everytime I think something is going straight, it's not. So, I'll just let you do you, okay? We can still be cool, I guess. But this is it!"
Monte grabbed her bag and rushed out of the front door. She rushed to her car and hopped in. She threw her purse in the passenger seat and cupped her face in her palm. She sighed in frustration and shook her head. She rolled her eyes and started her car. She wanted something with Ray, but if he didn't want her, then she wasn't going to force him to be with her. He didn't even know what he wanted and that was fine.
Situationships are fun until it's time to get serious.
Ray watched as she started her car and drove off. He didn't know what to say and he knew he hurt her feelings in some type of way. Maybe later they'll figure something out. After all, they still have each other's number and they don't hate each other.
~~~~~~~~~~~
After a couple days of being left alone in their thoughts, they decided to link again to talk about their feelings and what to do moving forward? Will that conversation be revealed? No. Thanks for reading 📖.
