𝓐𝓵𝓹𝓱𝓪 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓞'𝓜𝓮𝓽𝓪 - Mark Zuckerberg x Barack Obama

4 - I Don't Try To Hide My Tears

Barack Obama could safely say he loved Zuck. But sometimes he had to admit, it felt like he was dating 2 different people.

3 if you count Michelle.

But in a weird way, he loved both sides of the lizard man. The snake-like, hissing baddie that cares about material things like Cadillacs, and the sweet side- the one that brings him blankets.

It was how fast he would change that Barack loved most, though. With his wife, everything was so predictable. Childhood obesity this, school lunches that. For YEARS. But with him...

The first time Obama had really noticed was on their first official date; they'd planned a black-tie trip to McDonalds.

As an old Taylor Swift song blared over the crappy speakers, they stared into each other's eyes over a basket of fries.

"Honey...were you born this powerful?" the former president asked in awe.

"Depends on what you mean by 'born...'" Mark looked at him blankly.

Obama raised an eyebrow. "Well...what do YOU mean?"

After a long pause, the lizard man began. "Well I've lived the life of every person who has ever lived. Once I completed that journey through hundreds of thousands of years and all the wonderful and horrible human experiences of the past and of the future, I hatched from an egg in the Amazon; a new being. I now have free reign within and outside of the rules of time and space- and I chose this life to find you."

A shining tear ran steadily down the former president's face. "Really?" he choked up.

Mark stared at him lovingly.

"I- I didn't know you would d-do that for me, I j-just thought it was perfect chance-"

"HA! As ifff!" Zuck yelled obnoxiously.

Obama paused. "W-what? But-"

"Oh puh-lease," he pulled a bedazzled watermelon cantaloupe elf bar from behind Barack's ear and inhaled the entire thing all at once. "You really think I'd actually do that? HO-NEEY, I- aACK-

Zuck choked on his words.

"Oh lordy of the great and pearliest heavens! Are you okay, dear?" Obama asked, concerned but reserved in his hurt from Zuck's words.

Mark nodded to the former president, but looked away, tears filling his eyes.

Barack didn't offer words of comfort. As much as he loved the inventor of Facebook, he also knew when he was being manipulated.

Instead of his usual girl boss self, Mark had shrunk to a frail man. His body was wracked with sobs as he melted into the filthy cloth seat adorned with cartoons of the Fry Guys and Early Bird.

After 3 hours, he finally sat up and looked at Obama. "I'm...sorry. I wasn't myself. I promise you, as Mark, that I did choose to spend my ascension with you, Barack Hussein Obama II."

"Wh- as Mark? I thought you didn't use that name?" the former president said, confused.

"I...use both. Sometimes I feel cuntier than normal. It's a spectrum. " Mark shifted awkwardly in his seat.