Talking to the moon

Chapter 37

slight trigger warning

Dyscalculia, Yunjin had never even heard that word in her life much less knew how to actually pronounce it. In layman's terms it was a math learning disability where the student can have a hard time understanding numbers or how to manipulate numbers. After a bit of testing that was the diagnosis the school had come up with for Eunchae. From how they described it, it actually made a lot of sense. Eunchae was smart, both Chaewon and her knew that, but she literally couldn't understand how numbers worked or how to use them. They left the school on Monday with a plan on how they wanted to handle all this, and even now on Saturday of the same week Yunjin could see then change in Eunchae.

She had a practice sheet out on the kitchen table, going over a few questions that Hanni had assigned her over the weekend. While originally Yunjin thought it was cruel to assign her weekend homework, Eunchae hadn't had an assignment all week and Hanni probably figured that the weekend would be the time they had the most time to work on the new methods they gave her. Chaewon was having an easier time understanding all this than Yunjin was, Yunjin chalked it up to her having problems in school when she was younger so she could sympathize with Eunchae. Yunjin had always been told things like this were just excuses for not working hard, and while at her age now she didn't agree with that it still was going to take her time to understand it completely. Her only requirement until then was just not to be an asshole.

Eunchae bit the tip of her pencil as she was thinking over the problem, causing Yunjin to slowly remove the pencil she had from her own mouth. The kindergartener was starting to pick up on habits that her and Chaewon had, it was so subtle that Yunjin almost didn't realize it. It was small things like the way Eunchae would sway while she stood, much like how Chaewon would when she cooked dinners. When Eunchae was concentrating she'd scrunch up her nose like Yunjin. It was cute, but Yunjin needed to be careful what she did now.

"Babe, are you still going out with Kazuha tonight?" Chaewon asked, walking into the kitchen dressed in her fuzzy pink Barbie pants and an old t-shirt. She took a seat on the other side of Eunchae, rubbing the girl's shoulder.

There was also that. The crushing guilt Yunjin was starting to feel from purposely not telling Chaewon the truth. Sure she was going out, but not with who Chaewon thought. And Yunjin didn't know how to feel about lying, she didn't want to destroy the trust they had with each other.

But she was already lying, so she had to follow through with it, "Yeah. We're meeting up for seven."

"You should probably start heading out soon then." Chaewon hummed motioning towards the clock. Yunjin was crushingly aware of that. She was just so close to calling it all off and telling him she couldn't go.

As much as she wanted to say she was over it, she wasn't. There had been so many times that Yunjin just wanted to call her Chaewon and talk, or ask her Dad for a hug. The last time she tried to get in contact with them was just after Eunha's passing, she had messaged her Mom on Facebook telling her all about what happened and asked if she could stay with them for a few weeks while she tried to find a new apartment because she really didn't want to be in a hotel and most importantly alone. She watched as the little icon notified her that she read it, the little bubbles pop up, and the message: Please don't contact me again.

So she pushed it down. Somewhere she barely even thought about it. She was doing well on her own, she had a good career, she had a family, a beautiful girlfriend. Why should she be concerned with someone like them. Eunha had fucked her up, Yunjin was aware of that. Most days she forgot about her parents, she didn't need them.

Reluctantly Yunjin got up off the table, laying a light kiss on Eunchae's forehead and then Chaewon's. She could tell Chaewon knew something was wrong, the lawyer was too observant for her own good. But she didn't say anything, she trusted Yunjin to tell her if something was wrong. "I'll be home in like two hours."