Until The Mockingjay Sings

The Soul

"Oh my god Cinna that was amazing!" I exclaimed when I saw him again.
"Thank you very much, bright colors fit you well." I couldn't help but smile. We headed up to our floor to have dinner and get ready for training tomorrow. We would have three days to prepare for the games, although many people had been preparing for much longer than that.
"Now careers, you know what those are?" Asked Haymitch. He was giving us a rundown on how the next three days would go.
"The kids from district one right?" Asked Peeta,
"and district two. Sometimes it can even stretch into three and four. These kids have been training for this day since they could crawl-" Haymitch was interrupted by Effie "BUT they do not get any special treatment." Peeta and I looked at each other but said nothing.
"So how do we beat them?" I didn't understand how this was supposed to be making us feel better.
"You don't. They will do most of the work for you, you don't fight, you survive." Surviving. That sounded simple enough.
"Do not show them any skill. Let them think you are not a threat." Finished Haymitch.
"We really aren't." I said. I was definitely not much of a fighter. I had gotten into a couple of petty brawls in the hub but I couldn't kill someone...
     "Is there anything that you think will come in handy during the games? It doesn't have to be violent but survival skills are great too." Asked Haymitch.
"I mean Peeta is pretty strong. I have seen him carry some heavy bags of flour to the bakery from the hub." I said, realizing I had just told this boy I had been watching him. Clearly my embarrassment was nothing compared to his. Was he blushing?
     "Okay okay that's a start, you will need to use your training time to channel that into something useful. Maybe learn to throw a punch. Now what about you Mila?" Haymitch put his attention solely on me.
"Umm, I mean Katniss showed me how to shoot an arrow a while back but I'm mediocre at best. I have really good memory though and I spent my whole childhood around plants and wildlife." Haymitch stayed quiet for a second, chewing the last bite of his second, second serving.
Finally he sighed, relieved. "Okay kids, not too bad. Get good fuel and rest, the real challenge starts tomorrow." The hopeful voice was back.

     That night, once again, sleep wasn't coming easily. I decided to get up and walk around hoping that I would find sleep wandering the halls. I was due for some fresh air so I stepped outside to the balcony (a perk only our district had! As pointed out by effie) and there next to a little fake garden was Peeta, looking out at the capitol.
     "Couldn't sleep?" He jumped a little, not expecting me.
"Oh hi, yeah. I don't see how anyone could." I nodded and stood next to him. For a while we stood in silence. There was a party going on at the capitol. Loud music and bright lights everywhere. It was macabre to think that this was a celebration for them. I think Peeta was thinking the same thing.
     "You know, if I die, I want to die being me." My confusion must have shown on my face because he continued, "What I mean is, I don't want the games to turn me into something I'm not. Something I don't want to be. If this is where I die, I'll do it on my own terms." And I understood exactly what he meant.
"I will do whatever I can to help keep it that way." I meant it. I had already decided I would keep this boy alive, might as well keep his soul alive while I'm at it. I caught myself staring at him. He had his eyes closed, maybe thinking or perhaps sleeping. He really looked like a boy. I mean he was just a boy, but he looked at peace. Perhaps in other circumstances we could've been just a boy and just a girl together.