Best For Last || Jacob Elordi AU

hot july moon

       You sucked in a breath at the sight of what had been awaiting you down the beaten dirt path, and you could see Jacob grinning proudly next to you from the corner of your eye. A couple yards away from the edge of the river were two blankets: the first was covered in finger foods like cut up sandwiches -- which you could tell from here were your favorite, peanut butter and honey -- various candies, and a few bags of chips. On the second blanket there was nothing but a wicker basket and two pillows.

"Sorry it's not a full course meal," Jacob apologized. "It had to be all room temperature stuff I could leave here while I picked you up."

Your mouth opened to speak, but it was hard to find words. He'd thought of you, planned this, set it up, lied to his parents, and snuck all the way back just for you.

"Sorry?" you repeated. "This is the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me."

You wrapped him in a hug, and he pulled you in as close as possible. A wavy lock of his tickled your forehead but you couldn't bring yourself to care. You kissed his cheek before pulling away, and looked back over the scene he'd prepared.

"Come on," he bumped his hip against yours. "Play some songs on your phone or mine and let's get into all this."

So you two sat. And ate, and talked, and laughed. And when most of the snacks were gone, Jacob wiped his hands over the grass to get the chip dust off, sparking another laugh from you. He was sitting criss-cross in front of you, while you sat slanted, your arms behind you propping you up.

"When did you think of doing all this?" you had to know.

He shrugged, "Just last week. Kind of a celebratory thing for finishing junior year together, kind of just wanted to spend time with my favorite girl."

"God you're perfect." you gushed. "I love you."

His face lit up, and he looked like he was about to respond, but then his expression fell. You tilted your head slightly to the side, wondering what had just gone wrong. He kept his gaze fixed on the checkered blanket.

"What's wrong?" you sat up and rubbed you thumb over his bare knee.

His brows came together and he swallowed hard before saying, "I know it must bother you that I don't say that back."

You'd been together four years at this point, and hadn't had gone back and forth on this subject in over three of those years. It was hardly something you noticed anymore.

"What- I mean, why do you say that?"

He looked up at you finally, "Does it not?"

You shrugged and offered a sympathetic smile.

"Exactly," he looked back down and started fiddling with the edge of his shorts. "I think, though, if you want to know my stupid reason, I'm willing to talk about it now."

You were honored, and relieved, and so unbelievably nosy about it; you tried not to let that last one show. "It's not stupid," you spoke gently. "I wanna hear it."

He exhaled finally, and told you everything. "My mom has cheated on my dad-- a lot. Most of the times were years ago when I was still too little to even know what was going on, but my sisters have told me all the stories now. My dad was distraught every time, but he kept forgiving her. Kept taking her back, kept trying."

You didn't stop rubbing his leg, and hoped it'd be of any comfort.

He went on, "He was trying to make her stay and be happy with him again like they used to be. But eventually, just a few years ago, he got tired of trying. Now they just... exist together. They don't sleep in the same room, they eat dinner at separate times and places, they don't go out together, nothing. But, they still tell the other they love them."

You sat speechless.

"What kind of bullshit is that?" Jacob shook his head, his expression a mix of anger and confusion. "That's what love is? Fuck that. I don't want that to be us, ever."

"It won't," you told him confidently, and he looked up at you with a frown.

The air had gone from humid to cool around you guys as the hours had passed, and the moon was so bright white above your heads you could see each other perfectly, despite it being past 10pm in the middle of nowhere.

"That's not... that's not us. We have something else completely."

The sincerity in his voice and face brought tears to your eyes, and all you could do was nod.

"But," his voice wavered, "I hope you know... that I still..."

"I know," you whispered, and took your hand off his knee only to cup his face and bring his lips to yours.

His hand grazed your elbow before trailing up to your shoulder, pulling you as close as your awkward position would allow. When you pulled off of him, you got back in your original position of leaning back, but this time, used one hand to reach behind you and unclasp your bra. Jacob realized what you'd done, and his widened eyes fell from your face, to your chest, then back up. Your brows twitched upward so slightly it was hardly noticeable. His perfectly pink lips parted, and he cautiously crawled over to you, joining your lips once again. You let him lay you back, and your kisses got a little slower, deeper. His hands wandered and you didn't stop them. Fearlessly you let your own hands find their way to the button on his shorts, and he pulled his mouth from yours as his breath hitched. You blinked slowly up at him as his eyes darted back and forth between yours.

The two of you said so much without saying anything at all. His expression of disbelief asked you if you were sure, and you small nod confirmed that you were. The look of sheer concentration on his face and feeling him pressed hard against you sent that familiar heat from your stomach shooting down between your legs.

Time moved impossibly slow as you helped each other remove every last article of clothing, holding eye contact every second you weren't connected at the lips. He left a trail of kisses over your jaw and down your neck, stopping there to suck for only a few intoxicating seconds before you stopped him. It was heaven but you couldn't have marks-- at least not there.

You slid against each other, sweat glistening on both of you, and you threw your head back as the two of you created a bond that would tie you to each other forever.