𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗮𝘀𝘆 • 𝘀𝗲𝗼𝗻𝗴𝗵𝘄𝗮

ｆｏｕｒ

chapter four:
"why am i feeling so empty yet my chest feels heavy?"

seola sighs for the hundredth time, she can't focus at work. something has been bothering her. or someone has been bothering her. park seonghwa is. he is bothering her. not personally but he's been in her head since morning. "seola, your client's here" she snaps out of her thoughts and stood. "i'll be back"

arriving at the lobby, she looked around until she found a familiar back. she never looked at her client's information before their meeting but now she regrets it. she sighs, lifting her heels. she has no choice but to face her client. it's professionalism. "m..mr. jeong, good afternoon." she stutters before placing her laptop down. her client's soft eyes lingering to hers. "seola"

she gulps. feeling her eyes sting making her hold in her tears. she hasn't yet to meet her ex-lover's eyes. "what...what kind of apartment do you prefer? i have a lot to offer you" she lifts her gaze, the corner of her eye still filled with tears threatening to fall. "uh... spacious enough for me and the girl i want to live with" yunho answers, eyes filled with tears like hers.

"i'm sorry, i wasn't usually like this" she shakes her head before she was offered a napkin by yunho which she grabs and wipes her cheeks. "how have you been?" yunho finally drops the topic. "the first 6 months were uh.. hard, how about you?" she meets yunho's eyes. "i mean, you were hurting the whole time. it's stupid of me to ask" she answered her own question. "seola"

"i miss you"

"stop it, yunho" she shakes her head. "you're right. i should stop. after all, i'm...married" she gulps, nodding while grabbing all the flyers to give to her client. "we're expecting, seola" she froze at that. she should just smile and sends her regards to the male but she can't. she can't bring herself to do so. "when?" she lifts her gaze. "in 2 weeks. it's a girl" yunho nods. "a girl"

"yeah, we always wanted a girl. sadly, under circumstances, we failed"

seola waves, forcing a smile whilst yunho gets in his car and drives away. she sighed, another tear falling from her eye. their relationship was perfect. they dated from 16-21, it was a long term relationship. during their 3rd year together, yunho had planned to move in with her already and she gladly accepted it. when the 4th year comes, thet started talking about marriage and how they want to have a girl. just one kid cause yunho stated he don't want her to struggle with pregnancy and taking care of their kids.

it was too good to be true.

however, when the 5th year comes. yunho had fallen into depression. seola did her best to talk to yunho but he wasn't responsive to her. she understands that part. she understands that he could not bring himself to talk about his problem. but that silence caught their separation. it was the hardest phase of their relationship. yunho never open his mouth for 3 whole months straight. he barely eats and would take liquids only. he lost a lot of weight and was force to get in rehabilitation.

she supports him. but the progress she waited to come never arrives. yunho was much worse when he was in rehabilitation so she took him out and let herself handle everything. and that was another mistake. she shouldn't have taken the matter in her hands. one day came and yunho finally talked to her. he stated that he was hurting but he don't know why. he said that he wasn't happy nor sad.

just empty.

yunho wasn't crying while he said those words to her. it's because he felt empty. he stated that it's the worst feeling a human being could go through. one statement from him was something seola will never forget. she would never forget it.

"i don't know how i have stored these feelings inside but i can't get them out."

"why am i feeling so empty yet my chest feels heavy?"

"help me, seola."

he asked for her help. she didn't know how to help him. she badly wants to help him but she can't. in fact, she has no clue how to help him. that was her greatest mistake. she should have raked her brain for solution but none. she can't think of one. just when did it go so wrong? how does she even recover from that?

her phone ringing immediately gets her out of her trance, she answers the call, not reading the caller. "hey, are you still at work?" wonji spoke from the other line. "wonji, uh...i need a drink" she took a deep breath to calm herself. "what? i never would have thought i'd hear that from you. you never invite me for a drink. did something happen?"  wonji rumbles. "are you not free?"

"i'm actually out. i just called cause the front desk yeowa called and said that you have been standing at the entrance and won't even move. i called to check on you, did something happen?"  wonji replies. seola sighs and hums as answer. "no, nothing happened. i think i'm just gonna go home. bye" she did not wait for the older to reply and just hung up.

seola walks alone in her neighborhood, her bag hanging on her shoulder and her other hand carrying a bag of alcohol she bought. she shouldn't be drinking when she has a business trip tomorrow but she won't be able to sleep if won't drink it till she's wasted. she has to drink to escape reality. however, it seems fate has other plans cause when she arrives at her front door, a black shiny car were park in front.

as she approached the car, it opened and it let out none other than park seonghwa. he's in his usual all black suit and a spectacles on. "are you just getting back, ms. song?" seonghwa spoke. "i...yes, what brings you here?" she replied. "i was asked by yeosang to bring this to you. apparently, wonji and him are busy with what couples usually do." seonghwa lifted the bag to her. she reached for it and found a couple of snacks in it.

"ms. song, you should head in. you seem tired and —"

seonghwa fails to finish his words when an unknown bullet comes firing towards them, the bullet itself bruising his cheek but not missing his car. his favorite car. a scream escape from the female in front of him before he grip her arm and throw her in his car. he rushed to the driver seat and starts the engine, driving out of the neighborhood. "what was that?!" seola gasps, still shaking from the events.

he remained quiet, eyes glaring at the side mirror where he found no one but he's sure someone had followed him. and they are aware of his relationship with song seola. "are you alright?" he asked once they were out on the main road where a lot of people are. "you're bleeding" he lifted his hand, trailing his thumb on the cut on his cheek. a hissed escaping him. "we're going to my house"

upon arriving, seonghwa informed his assistant about what happened and demanded to tighten the security. he led the female in and told her to sit. "do you have a first aid kit here?" seola asked. "in the kitchen" the female nods and silently walks in the kitchen and returns soon with the kit on her hand. "sit" seonghwa was surprised at the way her tone changes but does as he was told to.

seola took out a piece of q-tips before using it to clean the blood. she was shaking but she chose to not mind it. not in front of park seonghwa. that was her first time experiencing a gun shot and she wasn't sure if she could take another one. "done" she mumbles, sealing the bruise with a band aid she found. "seola" seonghwa grip on her wrist before leading her to sit on the coffee table and in front of him. "what happened just now, i want to apologize. are you feeling good?"

"can you ask me that tomorrow? i don't think i can give you a decent answer right now" she let out, her heart still hammering in her chest. "i understand. i had my room cleaned up for you, you can stay there. it's the most secured room in my house" seonghwa explains. "how about you? you almost died" she meets his eyes. "this is not the first time this happened. a cut on the cheeks is nothing"

"i don't think i can sleep" seola dragged her head down, sighing. her legs trembled once again as she recalls the event earlier. to her surprise, a soft and light hand caress her trembling legs making her lift her head. "it's fine. my house is safe."

"you're safe here with me"