I slowly stand up on Glacies back, and my voice goes down low. So low that Liam starts floating. I try not to cry, but my voice falters as we get closer and closer. My eyes glow a bright yellow, and in one snatch of his claw, Liam is swooped up and placed back with Deigh. I collapse, coughing.
Baide is airborne behind us, racing toward her asshole of a rider, who is still gloating on the top of that fucking tower. Anger surges through me as my power is practically begging to be unlocked. If this is it, if my power is backlashing, then I'll be damned if I don't take that asshole with me. Glacies is fireproof—but not Jack. "Faster!" I shout, my voice desperate with worry we won't make it in time.
We shoot forward, and my adrenaline courses through me as my magic appeared, for the first time, bright red. My hands moved instinctively as I pushed back, the mountain came crumbling down.
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Jack falls down the mountainside in an avalanche of rock that I know he can't survive. From the way Baide cries beneath us, she knows it, too.
My hand trembles as I sheathe the clean dagger at my ribs. The only blood to be found is on the rocks below, though I look at my hands as though they should be covered in death. Glacies roars with the unmistakable sound of pride. I also hear Sgaeyl let out a roar, showing her proudness of me.
My Chaos Wielder.
We land in the flight field what feels like minutes later. Or maybe it's been a lifetime. I'm not sure.
The ground shakes as dragons arrive to the left and right, the field quickly filling with celebrating riders from Fourth Wing and angry ones from First. The dragons take off as soon as their riders dismount, with the exception of Khione, who stays with me as Glacies takes off.
Jack is dead.
I killed him.
But.... I don't feel any remorse. Killing him... felt good. I shake my head, and stumble up.
Across the field, Garrick lifts the crystal egg above his head as Dain waves the flag, and those in Fourth Wing cheer, rushing toward the pair like they're gods. I sit down, exhausted.
Tell me Liam is alive. Tell me it was worth it.
Deigh says that he lives. The sword went through his side. Khione says calmly.
I let out a sigh of relief.
" Damn Rose, you've been holding out on us." Sawyer whistles. I can barely keep my eyes open.
" Flower?" I look up tiredly. Xaden gets me up, and I lean on him, my whole body aching and my legs sore.
" I killed him." I say quietly. Xaden stops.
"Listen to me, Sorrengail." He lifts one hand to stroke loose tendrils of hair behind my ear, his touch surprisingly gentle. "The world is a better place without Barlowe in it. We both know that. Do I wish I'd been the one to end his miserable life? Absolutely. But what you did will save countless others. He was nothing more than a bully and was only going to get worse as he grew more powerful. His dragon will choose another rider when she's ready. I'm glad he's dead. I am glad you killed him."
I just nod, dropping my head down his chest. " Come on." He gestures, and picks me up bridal style. I close my eyes, my stomach churning. " You did a good job today, Flower." I just smile, making a noise of agreement. I'm set down in a bed, and I curl up. Xaden sits down next to me.
" I'm just amazing, aren't I." I sigh. Xaden snorts.
" When you're not mad at me, sure Flower."
" Yeah well, At least I didn't try to kill someone the moment I saw them." I argued back, raising a finger, then dropping it down the second after.
" Technically I saw you first at the Parapet before this one." He corrects. I roll over to face him.
" That's right." I realize.
" Mhm. Then you bumped into me." He continued.
" And you said, " Watch were you're going, bitch.'" I finished. He winced.
" Yeah, well, that year was not good for me." He sighed. I giggled. " I have to go, Flower." I frowned.
" Aw. Bye bye." I curl up, closing my eyes.
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After lunch, I walk out by the creek to think. While I'm sitting there, I think. About how Brennan would think if he saw me now.
If dad would be mad I didn't go to the Healers Quadrant.
How much it would take for Mother to like me.
" Hey Flower." I give a small smile to Xaden as he sits down next to me.
" What's wrong." He asks immediately. I stand up, pacing back and forth.
" I can feel the Chaos magic. I can it feel it. It's always waiting for the right time to come out, like a cat stalking it's prey. And- And when I killed Jack, It just felt so-" I clench my hands. " Good." I finish. " And it shouldn't feel like that, because I shouldn't enjoy killing someone." I ramble. " And-"
" Flower!" Xaden takes my face in his hands, stroking my chin gently. " It's ok. It's to feel this way-"
" Don't give me that bullshit." I rip out of his grasp. His eyes narrow.
" Fine. You know what? Deal with it. We kill people here. People get killed. It's how the Riders function. It's how dragons function. It's how wars function. So get the fuck used to it." He follows me back inside to my room.
"We're riders," He finishes. He takes hold of my hands and brings them to his chest. "So do whatever you need to get it out. You want to yell? Yell at me. You want to hit something? Hit me. I can take it." I can't take it anymore. There's a mixture of emotions parading in my body right now. Anger, Lust, Love, Giddiness. So I do whatever a sensible person would do.
