𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄- 𝐇𝐀𝐘𝐌𝐈𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝐀𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐘.

𝟐- 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝.

''Well, I didn't think I'd be seeing you so soon.'' says Haymitch. He was utterly hungover, lounging on the sofas that lie in front of me. Darkk looked shell shocked. ''Please just help us, Haymitch.'' Darkk asks. ''God. Just let me get on the train first, go say bye to your little families.'' He taunts.

I walk upstairs of the Justice Hall, and I sit in a room. After 5 minutes, my other friend, Carine Everdeen comes in. ''You can do this Peony, We'll be watching from 12, Find food and fight your ground.'' I hug her, ''That didn't end well for Maysilee last year.'' I whisper. She pulls out of the hug. ''No, but I promise that everything will be okay.'' We were cut short by the peacekeepers intersecting our conversation and my mother walks in. My mother hugs me and doesn't pull away until I do. ''What do I do, Mum!'' I shout. ''My girl, Do what you must. Be willing to show everyone who you are.'' I'm not sure why, but this response stuns me, but I have her support, and that means everything. After a few moments, Peacekeepers come in and take me to the train. Before I left the room, I shout ''I love you mum!'' I couldn't hear her response because they slammed the door behind me.

I boarded the train, waving goodbye to home. Tears forming in my eyes. The compartments were glorious, a piece of the Capitol. ''The trains too flashy for me, how about you, sweetheart? Any thoughts on this neon brick?'' I look around, the colours hurting my blurred eyes. '' I think that they must know their colour theory.'' I say snarkily. Haymitch laughs. Darkk comes in shortly after, He had tear stains running down his face. He let out a gasp. ''Sorry, this is a little more than what I'm used too in the Seam.'' We walk into the living quarters. ''Well! Finally! Take a seat, my dears!''. The escort was too happy, does she not know that this is the train ride to my death? Darkk goes and sits on the opposing sofa. I walk in hastily, I turn around and meet the gaze of Haymitch, I give him a look. ''That's a look, sweetheart.'' he jokes. I sit next to Darkk. ''so, what's your name?'' I ask the escort. ''Well! My name is Elenia!''

''Well Elenia, Could you direct me to the bar cart?'' Haymitch asks amusingly. Elenia stands up, turns round and directs Haymitch to the bar cart. While she was turned round, Haymitch's head shot round and mouthed ''crazy.'' I can't help but smile. Once it was just me and Darkk, He goes to find his room and I'm left in solitude on a flashy sofa. The grief caught up with me. I start silently sobbing, I miss Jackson, all I've done the past day without him is do nothing but laugh, get pissed and smile. how could I be so horrible? I cry and cry for what seems like eternity. However, I wasn't just grieving Jackson's life, I was grieving mine. I rock forward and back, curled up in a ball, crying on a capitol bred sofa. The memories of me and Jackson played back to me in a movie in my mind, us outside the shop on a summer's day. Us in the sweet shop, us on our winter walks. Us at 7 playing with rocks. It was all my fault, me, I caused this. I start to calm down after what I assume to be 30 minutes or so. I needed to find a bathroom to wash my face. I get up in a huff, wondering until I open the first door that lay in front of me. I open the door expecting to find a bathroom, instead I'm met by Haymitch at the bar, facing me. I reflexively shoot my head down and apologise.

''Want to talk about it, Sweetheart?'' A half-drunk Haymitch asks. I refuse and go to leave. ''Say, if Miss Peony WAS in fact crying, she should know, In the arena, you can't cry, cry all you want now, in the arena, you cry, you die. '' That stung, the words echoed. ''Like you dealt with loss well!'' I shout. I slam that door and go find my room. After 10 wrong doors, I find my room. The clock read 6:35, Dinner would be served in 10 minutes. A pang of regret overfilled me. I tried to make up ways not to go to dinner. I came to the conclusion that if Haymitch was sat at the table, I would just turn around and not eat, I would order something later. Haymitch's words bouncing to each edge of my brain. ''If you cry, you die.'' I probably had to accept that sooner or later, everything has changed, I'm not just playing these games, I'm playing the Capitol.

The ding that signalled dinner echoed through the compartment. I get up, sweep my blonde mess that is my hair out my face. I walk straight forward from my room and do a left, that's the way to the living facilities. I sit down at the Mahogany table, shortly met by Darkk and Elenia. ''This just looks absolutely fantastic!'' Elenia squeals. The smell overtook me, beef stew, bread rolls, salad, sausage, you name it, I guarantee it would be lying on this table. Darkk looked amazed, since he's from the seam, they must not see much hot food, if they do, it would be some odd carcass from the Hob. He grabs handfuls of everything, bowls of soup, and started eating with his hands. Elenia looked disgusted, I could almost laugh at her face, Jackson would find her face hysterical. I carefully take a bowl of Beef stew, two bread rolls and some chicken. I knew how to use cutlery, I was taught, expected to every night. Elenia grabs some food an starts nibbling on it. Darkk demolishes his food in seconds and goes back for more. I graciously use my spoon for my stew, dunk my bread into my stew, and this seems to settle Elenia a bit.

Once everyone had finished 20 minutes later. A half sober Haymitch walks in. I go to stand up from my previous post. I had no intention of seeing him again, a drunk comment or not, I retaliated. ''Don't think about going anywhere, Damston.'' I stay seated. He drags himself lazily to the table. My head was still pounding from our past endeavours 24 hours previous.

''Sorry. I shouldn't of said that about you, you went through unimaginable things.'' I say somewhat sincerely. ''What I said about the arena, I stick by, your traumatised from losing your best-friend.'' Traumatised? Peony Damston does not get traumatised, Haymitch is trying to be nice. I shoot a nod of acceptance. Darkk and Elenia shoot confused looks at each other, god, I'm glad they don't know, One less person I have to be myself to.

''I'm gonna go to my room, When we arrive in the Capitol I'm guessing we won't get much rest.'' Darkk announces. ''I'll go too.'' I say. I walk back into my room, put my pyjamas on and lie down. I'm never drinking again, how do the after effects not put Haymitch off? he's starting drinking more on the train. bad memories I guess. These were the last thoughts before I drifted off.

I wake up screaming Jackson's name. Jackson was climbing a tree, 15 feet up, then he fell, and the familiar sound of his neck snapping haunted me. I breathe heavily, realising I've only just stopped screaming. Haymitch comes running in, wearing pyjama bottoms, no top. ''Peony!''

''I'm sorry, It was just a nightmare.'' I say shakily. ''It's fine. come find me if you need anything.'' Haymitch says. That was the first time I think I've heard him sincere. Haymitch leaves and I curl back into my sheets, closing my eyes and attempt to stop my shaking body from tremoring more. I must've fell back into sleep in-between my pacing thoughts.

I awoke again at 7:30, I turned over, who was sat in the armchair opposite? Haymitch Abernathy asleep. I carefully leave the room, trying not to wake up Haymitch. I must've not been very careful because as soon as I shut the door and take 3 steps forward, Haymitch comes out. ''You were shaking in your sleep, I was scared it was some wacko seizure thing, Can't have you dying now, can we sweetheart?''