Parallel Hearts

Chapter 5 - Poppy

Elliott and I were best friends. Into 4th grade we were inseparable. I'd go to his house and we'd rollerblade in his basement. He'd come to my house, and I'd show him my talent show dance in my basement. We would go to the park a roller blade around the track. When we would go to friends roller blading birthday parties we would skate around holding hands. He would have me over and show me all the tricks he could do on his trampoline. Truth be told he's the first guy I ever loved... but you already knew that didn't you.

One day in 5th grade, the moment that will forever be burned into my heart as the biggest mistake I could ever make happened.

It was my birthday, Elliott and I were boyfriend/girlfriend but my best friend, Sierra, and I were in every class together. The only time I got to see Elliott was during recess because we didn't end up in any classes together. He came to recess with a gift for me.... One semi deflated balloon.

"Poppy! Happy Birthday! Here", Elliott hands me a red balloon and smiled so wide.

Blushing, I say, "Thank you, this is so nice!"

"There's actually a surprise inside the balloon for you! Let me help you get it out."

Elliott takes the red balloon and tries to pop it. It squeaks and screeches as he fumbles to pop it carefully. I realize as he moves it around that something it jingling around on the inside. Purrgggrrrgffffffffff urrrrp. Elliott got the balloon to pop and inside shining in the fluorescent lights of our school was a heart shaped locket necklace. I stop. My breath catches in my lungs. This can't be real. Did Elliott, a boy, THE boy, my first love, really buy me jewelry?

With trembling hands, he passes me the necklace. "Open it Poppy!!" As I struggle to pry the locket apart I start sweating. "I really don't want to hurt it!" I stammer as I hook my nail into the crease. POP!! There, open in my hands, are two perfect Shrinky Dink pictures of Elliott and I.

"Thank you for my birthday present." I say trying to hug him, but now our friends are pulling us to go play at recess and suddenly I'm not standing by him anymore.

With a bite of jealousy, Sierra says "Let me see what Elliott gave you". She snatches the locket from my hand as we hide under the playground equipment. Laughing and tangling the chain all together Sierra says, "Isn't it too soon to get jewelry from a boy?"

Grabbing it back from her, "I'm not sure... but I think it's pretty!". I did think it was pretty. The locket was silver and had tiny faux stitch details outlining the outside of the heart. It was utterly perfect, and it was mine! It was heavy but not in a bad way. It made my tummy do somersaults. I just kept staring down at it in awe.

Seeing me transfixed on the locket Sierra declares "Well I think it's really weird and I don't think you should keep it."

Holding the locket in my hands under the playground equipment, I opened and closed it again and again trying to figure out what I should do. Should I listen to my best friend? Was it really that weird? Was Elliott moving too fast?  I held the locket tight; I knew what I had to do! Fumbling with the clasp as my hands shook and my friend rolled her eyes, I put the locket on and beamed with pride as the bell rang. I ran to line up to go inside from recess. That's when Elliott spotted the locket shining around my neck and he knew that I loved it. Elliott, standing in a separate line to go back to class, looked so happy and all his friends were playfully pushing him singing. "Poppy and Elliott sitting in a tree...."

Record Scratch

No matter how many times I think back to this exact moment it never changes. This universes Poppy did not do any of that.

Rewind Sound

Holding the locket in my hands under the playground equipment, I opened and closed it again and again trying to figure out what I should do. Should I listen to my best friend? Was it really that weird? Was Elliott moving too fast? I held the locket tight; I knew what I had to do. 

"Sierra, I think you're right. This feels like too much and I'm embarrassed. Everyone is making fun of me and I have to give it back to him." 

"NO! I have a better idea Poppy. Bury it and act like you lost it."

Sierra and I start digging under the steps of the playground equipment. We have woodchip chunks digging under our nails and when we finally think the hole is deep enough, I drop the necklace inside the hole. The bell sounds and we start throwing the mulch and dirt over the hole. We run for our classrooms line and I try to avoid Elliott's stare. 

He knew though. Do you know when something bad is about to happen and you can tell by how the air suspends, thick and hot, catching in your throat. I stared at Elliott in the line next to me. His head hung low and his shoulder were slumped so far over that I knew he saw what I did. 

All I can remember feeling in that moment as a little girl was that I regret what I did. I have no memory of if I ever tried to find the necklace again. I think about it all the necklace all the time though. 

Later when I got home from school I called Elliott on our landline. His mom said he didn't want to talk to me. 

That's the exact moment I remember thinking I had lost him forever.