ʙᴜʀɴɪɴɢ ᴅᴇꜱɪʀᴇꜱ

Chapter 11

Amelia

As the thoughts and images in my head alternated one after the other in totally irregular order at the speed of light, nothing was faster or more confusing than my wild heartbeat. It kicked, thrashed, screamed in its attempts to escape from my chest. A flock of unholly thoughts blessed all parts of my body, and as if they were paying tribute to that man for whom I still tremble like a flower.

I think that in a very short period of time, I went from being an overly disciplined and maniacally organized person to a total mess. Or I just slowly started to let go of the threads, which slipped from my fingers, leaving a burning and painful trail of open wounds.

I got into the car and threw myself into the seat, closing my eyes tightly.

His lips were still hovering over mine. The heat of his panting breath swirled around my face, as if he was still there. I shook my head in an attempt to summon myself, but the feeling of his warm and inviting skin under my fingers haunted me.

The strong, fast beats of his heart caressed my palms and seemed to change my fingerprints and engrave his name instead.

I didn't like the way his presence made me lose control and evoked some feelings that were too real for me. Too real to be true.

I started the engine and went to one one person where I will try to calm my thoughts. Brooke.

I left my car in the cafe's half-empty parking lot and a feeling of calmness slowly began to flood my body when I saw her smiling face through the window.

The doorbell vibrated through the room and Brooke immediately turned her head in my direction, looking away from the empty tables. Dozen people drank their coffee in the quiet and peaceful atmosphere of the cafe.

"Ams, you just made my day!"

Her voice broke the calmness and stupor of the customers and after a few moments they all returned to their coffee induce meditations.

I didn't even know how much I missed her hug until she wrapped me tightly in it. She sat down at the bar and left her cloth on it. I followed her and sat next to her.

"What brings you to me in the middle of working hours? A tough case?"

"You can't even imagine how tough it is . . ."

I rested my head on my palm and my elbow on the bar.

"Brooks, I'm totally out of my mind. Things have been happening to me that make me think I'm losing control, my mind. . ."

How I wanted to tell her about William, but that topic was simply out of reach. I am comdemned to go through that agony alone.

"What is it sweety?"

She said with a generally worried expression on her face, placing her palm on my knee for support. This was a rare occasion where I willingly showed my vulnerability and openness. Maybe that rigid attitude was just a mask to cover how many vulnerable spots there are on my body and within me.

"There is one guy . . ."

"It's always a guy!"

She squealed in her raspy voice, offering me a wide smile.

"He's so, so annoying, cocky, rude. He's an asshole, always picks an opportunity to get on my nerves."

Brooke rolled her eyes and rested her face in the palms of her hands.

"Honey, that's how every fucking love story starts."

"No, this has nothing to do with a love story. This is about attraction. Pure physical attraction. Because even though he gets on my every possible nerve, he's so. . . muscular, tall, enchanting. His look, oh man! I could cum just looking into his eyes."

"This is one hell of a situation. I don't remember ever hearing you talk like that. Never actually! Does that fatal loverboy have a name?"

She must have said it a little louder because an older woman sitting at the table near us cleared her throat loudly, casting judgmental glances in our direction.

"Sebastian Reese. The man with who we've recently made the deal of the century."

"Wow, someone likes to mix work and pleasure. You didn't seem like a type who'd do that. Bravo!"

She continued to tease me and her approach to ease everything with a joke, made me even more relaxed to open up to her.

"There's no pleasure Brooke. Just tension. Nothing happened between us. Except for a couple of situations that honestly aren't even clear to me. He says I'm not his type and that he is not interested but then he always finds an opportunity to touch me and show me the opposite. . . He's making me hit the ceiling."

She grabbed me by the shoulders with both hands and grounded me a little.

"Girl, do you realize how long you haven't had anyone in your life? Way too long. Maybe you should just relax and have some fun. There's nothing wrong with a little midnight fun."

I was so tense that any kind of letting go seemed like a guilty pleasure. It was as if I was trying to punish myself by depriving myself of things that would relax me a little and make me not worry too much for once.

"Okay, enough about me. Tell me is there anything new with you and Gabriel?"

I tried to change the subject but I was genuinely interested in their status. I so wanted to tell her about the black motorcyclist, but since I didn't know who he could be and whether he was from the world I wanted her to be far away, I kept quiet.

"He came the day before yesterday. He brought me a bouquet of roses and seemed sincerely penitentand. I let him explain because I've always hated misunderstandings, but we're still on shaky ground. I will make him work hard for forgiveness."

She winked at me and I could see the relief on her face when she told me that.

"Excuse me, can we have the bill?"

A younger man raised his hand to call Brooke.

"Honey, I have to go, but we're arranging a ladie's night soon. Deal?"

"I am coming."

She patted me on the shoulder and headed towards the young couple who called her. But before she did, she bent down and told me.

"A little fun didn't kill anyone. Relax. You deserve it."

How I wish her words were true, but unfortunately I have witnessed the exact opposite.