✧THE FOURTH BETRAYAL✧ || SCARAMOUCHE X READER

9 | Humans And Puppets

Kabukimono's POV

A sharp slap against my cheek couldn't dull the overwhelming pain from Y/N's death. Tears streamed down my face, and it seemed everyone else was crying too. Today was meant to be my birthday, a day of joy, so why did it have to be filled with so much agony? The sting on my cheek was nothing compared to the ache inside. Y/N's absence hung heavy in the air, casting a shadow over what should have been a celebratory day. The laughter and happiness I expected on my birthday were replaced by quiet sobs and sorrowful whispers. 

I couldn't understand why life had to be so cruel right now. The birthday cake on the table seemed insignificant in the face of such deep grief. Instead of celebrating, we were mourning together, and the weight of loss made the day feel darker than it should have been. 

When Emiko found Y/N's body at the Eternal Tree with her heart torn out, she had fainted from the shock. When the news travelled to my ears, I felt like I was being torn out instead. My body was becoming ripped to pieces, my eyes unable to focus and my face was being cut down. I became frozen, yet I was also trembling in torment. 

Because I knew that it was because of me. 

The reason that she had plucked her heart out from her chest - I knew it was because of me. The guilt was eating me up, and everyone was suffering from my own mistakes. If only... If only I hadn't said I wanted to be a human. I should have remained a puppet on strings, embracing what I was, instead of reaching for something I could never truly become. It was a foolish mistake. 

Last night at the Eternal Tree when she told me to go, I should have stayed. I should have refused to go. I should have been by her side. What I felt now was regret. A burning pain that I couldn't rid of, and even the thornful words that came upon me were probably not a true representation of their suffering. Everyone was suffering, not just me. 

It's all my fault. 

It's all my fault. 

It's all my fault. 

It's all my fault. 

It's all my fault. 

"It's all your fault...!" Y/N's mother cried out with pain in her voice, her tears streaming down relentlessly. Her husband was quietly sobbing in the corner, kneeling while banging the floor, wailing in distress. The wooden toy train that Ayuto was going to give me was smashed on the floor, and sister Misen locked herself in her room. Emiko also refused to exit her room, presumably in shock and pain from losing her best friend. 

In the end.... we weren't family. 

In the end... they were a human and I was a puppet. 

In the end... I could never be them. 

"My poor baby...!" Y/N's mother dropped to the floor, crying her heart out. Ayuto wasn't showing his pain as much as her, yet I could still feel that he was in a wreck in the inside. Everyone knew that it was my fault - they knew I was a puppet who desired a heart, and Y/N was the one to give me it. 'I've killed her.'  If I didn't exist... Y/N would still be here, happily prancing around. 

Yet because of me... she had died. 

It wasn't just Y/N's parents, Ayuto or sister Misen, or even brother Hideshi who may have heard about the news, that would despise me. Emiko. Would she hate me too? Surely... she would. She would probably want to slap me too, a dozen times - no, a thousand times. She would slap me until I was at the brink of death, then torture me with words instead. Even though it was Y/N that stabbed herself and tried to remove her heart, in the end it was for me. Yet Emiko stayed trapped in her room, unable to breathe properly, crying uncontrollably. 

I wanted to stab myself like Y/N had stabbed herself - would that make up for her loss? I wanted to run away, for I was no longer belonged here. I wanted to disappear - I should have never seeked shelter under the tree in the first place, I should have ignored her when she talked to me, I should have rejected her help, I should have... never...been...born. 

"My poor baby... How could you leave the world before me...? My baby... I loved you so much... I'm sorry... I'm sorry my baby...!" As I watched the scene of Y/N's mother crying out in so much agony, I wanted to express my emotions too, but would that make me feel more guilty? 

I bit my tongue as I tried to process that Y/N was dead, and a faint taste of iron gradually filled my mouth. 

It's all my fault.

It's all my fault.

It's all my fault.

It's all my fault.

It's all my fault. 

"I'm sorry." I said as my voice cracked, the taste of blood slowly becoming greater and more prominent. This was only but a small sacrifice. Y/N was found with blood all over her - her hands, face, chest, clothes. 

Ah... Would Y/N hate me too?  She would hold nothing but abhorrence - she had died for me. 

"Sorry? Did you think that apologising would bring her back to life? You've destroyed her... and you've destroyed us! I should have never taken you in, you murderer...!" As Y/N's mother yelled out in suffering, she slapped me once more. It should have hurt, yet my cheeks felt numb to everything. It left a visible mark on my cheeks, yet I didn't protest against it. I didn't have the right to yell 'stop'. I deserved all of this. 

As she saw that I had let her slap me without any protest, she clenched her teeth and slapped me once more, until the number of times her hands smacked my face almost reached a count with three digits. Yet I continued to remain numb to the pain. 

But when she reached a hundred, she suddenly stopped. She paused, gave me a sharp glare with her teeth clenched, and then let out a sigh. The silence that followed carried a mix of weariness and frustration, leaving a question unspoken between us.

"Leave, and never come back. Puppets were never destined to be with humans." 

After those words, a heavy silence hung in the air. The weight of her command settled on my shoulders as I turned away, my steps becoming a deliberate echo against the quiet backdrop. The once-familiar surroundings seemed colder, each footfall emphasizing the distance that was growing between us. 

I glanced back only once, catching a glimpse of the place that was once home, now a landscape of memories tainted by farewell. The echoes of our shared moments lingered in the air, and the quiet solitude of departure settled around me like an unwelcome companion. With each step, I couldn't help but wonder if this was the end of a chapter or the closing of an entire book. 

I brought all of this on myself. 

Y/N... if you're watching from above, I'm sorry. As those words spiralled in my head endlessly, I couldn't escape the depth of the emotions swirling within me. I imagined her gaze, distant yet somehow still connected, and the thought weighed on my conscience like an anchor. 

I regret that you died because of my wishes, and I'm sorry for not responding properly when you confessed to me. I should have just said the words back, not question if it was okay for us to be together. 

Because the truth is... 

I love you too.

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A/N: Our first Kabukimono POV! 

We are nearing the end of PART 1!

Also I'm currently saving for scaramouche/wanderer :D (f2p)

Thank you for reading!