Dear Laura 2

Chapter 3

We finally reached our destination, and I stayed in the car while he got out. He walked to the passenger side and opened the door for me. I did not move. My eyes were locked to the windscreen.

"Mia." He said, his voice gentle this time.

I did not respond. He called out again and I kept quiet. I was not necessarily mad at him; I was just terrified. That's what happens when you watch Hulk go all Hulk on you. Instead of trying to talk to me again, he carried me bridal style and took me to my place. He placed me on the bed and brought me a glass of water.

"Hey baby. I'm really sorry about what happened at the club." What was frozen inside of me started to sweat, one drop.

"I did not mean to scare you like that. I am so sorry pumpkin." Two drops.

"I got worried about you when you were not here and when I saw you in the club, the worry somehow turned into something it wasn't supposed to be and it spiralled out of control. I did not realise I was pushing away the one person I want to hold onto." Three drops.

"Life feels empty when I am not around you Mia, it literally drives me crazy. It got worse when I saw that man claiming you. I—I just lost myself for a bit there, I love you so much Mia." My whole heart was now liquid, melted by his words. A smile managed to creep onto my face, and I saw him let out a breath of relief.

"It's past midnight Mia." He said, defeat evident in his voice and eyes. He was calmer then. "How am I supposed to marry you and introduce you to my family when you are acting available and partying until past midnight." He cupped my face delicately, like he was scared he would hurt me. He then wiped a tear that had recently escaped my eye.

Marry me? I did not believe that I heard him correctly. My brain filtered out the rest of the words he said and held onto the part whereby he basically said he wanted to marry me. By the sound of that, all my insides were liquid. He mentioned marriage even before I revealed the pregnancy to him. 

I closed my eyes as I took in all of his touch, the odd softness of his fingers as he carefully used them to caress my face. A tear dropped from my eye and landed on his thumb. He delicately wiped the tear away just before placing a peck on my forehead, creating fireworks inside my brain.

The brushes he made on my cheek gradually destroyed the panic I felt inside, replacing it with warm feelings and a sense of safety. The feelings his touch erupted inside of me were indescribable. I think heaven was no match for it.

How could someone manage to simultaneously make me feel so much anguish and tranquillity? How could one human being consistently create war inside of me, tear me to pieces as they willed and then made sure to build me back up, only to repeat the process over and over again. I was his to toy with and he made sure he used up the opportunity. His unstable love consumed me, draining me until there was nothing left of me. However, as chaotic as we were, that man captivated me in ways nobody could.

After embracing his touch on my face, my mouth met his in a frantic kiss—One that deleted everything that had occurred before then. We kissed away the negative thoughts, the pain, the uncertainty, and the shame. We kissed away the fear and the anxiety, replacing it with lust and intense hunger for each other. I ran my fingers through his hair and palmed it as I let him claim my body for himself. His kisses went from my mouth to my neck and to my thighs where he rolled my dress up.

"Take it off." He whispered, clearly breathless.

I did as I was told, like the conforming lady that I was. He trailed my stomach with his kisses, making me arch my back, failing to contain the tingly feeling that his teasing induced. His fingers snaked their way to my back and unclasped my bra. I always considered it pure talent how he could do that with one hand. He tossed the bra to the floor then went on to cup one of my breasts in his incredibly large and soft hand. My breasts were tender and swollen but I had to suppress the pain I felt from his touch to avoid telling him why they were sore. Just when I was getting accustomed to the feeling, he moved up to suck the skin on my neck, making sure to mark his territory with red. The red marks that complemented his red flag behaviour well.

"You should throw away that dress." He said in between his kisses. My skin tingled as it felt his hot breath against it. "I don't want you wearing it anymore." His voice was gentle. I was too occupied with his kisses to argue his case.

"Mia!" He wanted me to respond.

"No, I like that dress. It's staying." I rebelled for what seemed like the second time that night. We were not even a couple, and he was throwing commands like he was getting paid for it.

He did not say anything, instead, he continued trailing my body with kisses and making me feel things that only he could make me feel. His kiss intensified right away, profound and dominating. I felt my body melting into his. As I was about to place my hands on his shoulders, he cuffed them and pressed them down over my head. My brain went into overdrive, and I could not contain how good it felt. He went back to claiming my lips, kissing them, licking, and sucking them, earning a sharp breath from me. He made me feel so darn good.

That's when he suddenly paused and said, "Don't ever go out of line like you did today. And don't you dare disobey me."

He left me on the bed, picked up the dress and went to the kitchen and used the kitchen scissors to tear it before dumping it in the trash can. That's when I saw the bouquet of flowers he got for me right below the dress. It pained to see them there.

"What the hell is wrong with you? What are you doing?" I yelled and flailed my arms in the air. Tears were already prickling my eyelids.

"How do you think I feel? Seeing you dressed like that, seeing the hunger in those men's eyes as they look at you flaunting your ass? Don't you think it pains me?"

Till this day, I do not believe that Abdul is a real person. What was wrong with him? No, seriously. His hot and cold behaviour was draining the life out of me.

"I didn't grind on that man, I turned him down. Were you stalking me?" Silence. "I'm talking to you." I raised my voice.

"I don't want you hanging out with that friend of yours anymore. She's turning you into a slut." More daggers to my heart. He threw them without flinching. He called me names like he hated me.

"You cannot tell me who to hang with and who not to."

"I just did. And don't even think about disobeying me." Disobey? Who did he think he was, my daddy? Ahem. I mean, my father? I was intrigued in what he was going to do if I did, so I let his words enter through one ear and escape in the other. I gave him a death glare before storming to my bedroom where I violently threw my pillow against the floor-to-ceiling window. He made me so damn mad!

Those three weeks were so good that I just wanted things to stay like that forever. Whereas with Abdul, you just never knew. I never knew which side of him to expect the next day. He surprised me every time. And when he did, he made sure to tear me down from inside out until I was left with nothing. To make me feel worthless, destroy every bit of confidence I worked so hard to build. Yet, I still held on. I'm in prison because of it. I'm in prison because I thought I could fix a man. I'm in prison because I was chasing after a man who was running away from me while still looking back to ensure that I was still there. I went from the captivity of his poisonous love to the captivity of the state. One might say I have a thing for imprisonment.