Heard it through the grapevine

Chapter 15

The remaining days of Michael's visit had been tough. Helena had felt like they were both living a lie, pretending that everything was fine when both of them clearly felt that something was off. Helena was feeling guilty and unsure of her feelings, while Michael was trying to convince himself that his jealousy and doubts was the root of the problem, not Helena.

They had barely talked since Thursday. Michael had accompanied Helena to the paddock every day, but he'd ended up spending most of the time by himself - Helena would usually be whisked away within a few minutes of arriving and while Helena knew that she could most definitely had made more time for him throughout the weekend, she didn't. Because her guilt was eating her alive, and so she figured that not being face to face with Michael would make it easier. It still consumed her, but without seeing his face, she felt that she could keep it at bay for a little while longer.

This tactic also meant that in a matter of only a few short days, it had reached a point where their communication was at a standstill. It had become a ritual now that upon leaving the paddock at night, Michael would tell Helena about his day, who he'd managed to meet and how he'd managed to kill time. Helena would listen and tell her some small bits from her day, but once they were back in their hotel, they would each spend the evening in their own company. Helena was mostly on her computer getting some more work done, and Michael would be doom scrolling in bed, eventually leaving to go find dinner for the both of them. She felt bad that she'd dragged him halfway across the world to spend so much time rotting away in a hotel room and by himself in the paddock, but she was trying to convince herself that work was mostly to blame for her lack of free time.

To make matters worse for Helena, Carlos had recently been seen with what the media assumed was a new girlfriend and social media was having an absolute field day trying to find dirt on her. Helena hated it when it was a driver's personal life getting all the attention, because why did it matter what they did in their personal lives, off track. She knew that it was partly because fans felt close to them and therefore felt entitled to know every single thing that goes on in their lives, as if they know them. For personal reasons, this aspect also worried Helena a little bit. She knew that there had been chatter online about Helena and what her role was, but she was not sure to what extent people were associating her with Charles. She knew it couldn't be too much, there were virtually no pictures of her online, so she assumed that they had been pretty decent at keeping their friendship, or whatever it was at this point, to a minimum in public.

Michael had inquired about Carlos' situation on Saturday evening in the hotel. He'd sounded curious about Ferrari's view on the personal lives of their drivers. "They can do whatever they want, as long as it doesn't affect the Ferrari image or their driving," Helena had told him while typing away on her computer. "Oh okay. So if Charles and Charlotte are really broken up, he can essentially date whoever, and how many, he wants?" Helena had continued typing, but she felt like the room was hotter than it had been 3 seconds ago. She knew where his curiosity was coming from, but she was hoping that his suspicions where only rooted in jealousy because his girlfriend was working closely with very attractive single f1 driver - most boyfriends would be jealous of that, right? "I guess, yeah. It's not really something we can control. As long as he doesn't fraternise with employees, he's fine." She wasn't sure why she'd decided to throw that in there, perhaps so that she would give him some sense of false security. It had worked, because it had to peak Michael's interest quite a bit. "He can't pursue F1 employees?" Michael looked almost relieved as he digested the information, carefully studying Helena's face. "No, he can't. It's not just Ferrari policy, it's F1 policy also. He's not allowed to pursue any F1 employee. It wouldn't exactly look great if he was hooking up with an engineer from McLaren." Michael nodded, looking like he was digesting some very vital information.