Bound By Love:Ishman Oneshot Collection

Will You Still Love Me?

It wasn't exactly something he could help. Given the opportunity, he would stop it instantly, without a second thought.

Because then things could go back to normal.

He didn't know when he had first started feeling … things for his friend. They had just snuck up on him one day, probably when he was practicing for upcoming series.

But whenever the … feelings had come, they had quite disturbed his life.

It wasn't as though one day Shubman was his friend and then next day Ishan wanted him to be more than that. It was more that everything had happened gradually.

They had connected from the very beginning; there was nothing new about that. But what was new was the way the connection had deepened – in Ishan's eyes at least.

He could remember the exciting prospect of having him for a friend – having all the ICT members as friends was amazing. But Shubman had always been different.

Not with any new friend (the few he had possessed outside of cricket, that was) had his mood lifted at the thought of him, or a grin graced his features at something he had said, no matter how small.

He knew something was wrong – different – when he told Shubman he looked fantastic and really found himself believing his supposedly platonic pronouncement.

He knew something had to be happening when all those innocent touches that had always occurred between them were suddenly suspicious and he found himself unconsciously increasing their frequency.

Something had to be up when he started searching the other's eyes for some sign of affection, for some indication that Shubman mirrored Ishan's desire to be more than what they were.

Something definitely had to be going  when he tried not to say much or do anything in Shubman's presence in case it was misconstrued and Shubman finally figured it out.

There was definitely a problem when Ishan had to keep a very tight reign on his impulses as they lay together in the dark as they always had and opened up to each other.

If Ishan didn't keep himself under close observation, he knew he would be unable to deny the urge to take Shubman's hand as they talked, or the desire to lean forward and just gently press his lips to Shubman's…

He was having that problem at that very moment as they lay facing each other in the dark, curled up tightly on Ishan's bed.

It was Shubman who was talking.

Shining in the dark, Shubmans' eyes were the only thing Ishan could see, and that was hard enough. He lay still and quiet as Shubman' spoke, doing nothing more than listening.

The rich, liquid sound of Shubmans' deep, beautiful voice trailed off and Ishan felt almost deprived. He loved Shubmans' voice. And his laugh. Oh, God, his laugh!

The way he could laugh at anything – a bad joke from Rishabh, a memory of a prank, a remark from Ishan – and lose himself completely in the moment. It was infectious, Shubmans' smile and if caught,Ishan had no choice but to immerse himself in the idiocy and double over as well.

"What're you thinking about?" Shubman asked, his close voice interrupting Ishan's thinking.

"You." He answered honestly and he felt Shubman smile.