The Alpha Rogue

Chapter Ten

Therapy. I was tricked into therapy. Okay, well maybe not tricked per se since I agreed. But how was I going to tell someone who was clearly worried about me and wanting to look out for me no? Especially when said person is royalty.

The Queen sat calmly in front of me patiently waiting for me to answer her question. Why are you here? I couldn't just say because you offered to give me free therapy and who am I to deny that. No, I knew what she wanted. She wanted to know my story. What got me to the point I am at. What happened that has led to me having some problems.

In my mind, I was debating on what to tell her. Should I give her a basic timeline of events? Or, should I go into full detail about everything I remember? The latter was more lengthy and I surely didn't have enough time for that. Of course, I wouldn't have time for any of my story if I didn't make up my mind soon. Since she probably knew some of it already, I decided to go for the shorter version.

"I was 3 when I was kidnapped from my pack. I don't really remember how it happened just that it happened. I fought back as much as a 3-year-old could but, obviously, it wasn't enough. I remember crying for a week straight, ignoring everyone around me. Alpha Black, the bastard who kidnapped me, finally had enough of me and slapped me. From then on, I was hit for every tiny mistake. But the beatings weren't all slaps.

"He whipped me, cut me, burned me. Any kind of torture he could think of. He turned me into a lifeless — yet perfect — shell. I was nothing. He reminded me of that constantly but, when I was 12, he decided to give me a purpose. A dreadful purpose. He told me that I existed only to please men like himself. He forced himself on me— a twelve-year-old! After he raped me, his 17-year-old son, Malcolm decided to use me too. I felt disgusted with myself. I asked myself, 'How could I let them do that to me?' Artemis, my wolf, was there for me. She reminded me that I was a child who had no training and was drugged. I didn't stand a chance against two guys.

"After that day, he made other people use me or torture me. It didn't matter if they had a mate or not. Or if they didn't want to do it. They had to. They didn't have a choice. Even though I wanted to die, I had one hope— my mate. Alexa, Alpha Black's mate, told me that I was destined to have a wonderful mate and when I turned eighteen, he'd find me and rescue me from this hell on earth I was living. When he found out that she was helping me, he killed her... So, the only hope I had was the imaginary mate I had. One who would save me. I fell in love with this fantastical idea as it was the only thing in my life that I had at the time. I expected a knight in shining armour but—" I stopped myself from saying more.

I couldn't tell her about my mate. That's her son. He'd probably kill me if he found out, even if I kept his identity anonymous. But he's also part of the pain in my past — and in the present, unfortunately. But what if she discovers who he is? What if she's disappointed in him? What if she sees him differently? I don't want that. Even though he is a jerk to me, I still think he will make a good king. I've made sure to keep up with politics. I've read about how my mate has helped the kingdom and how he plans to help in the future. When I was in a coma, I heard him talk patiently about his kingdom and I knew he would make an amazing king. There is no doubt in my mind. Just not an amazing mate.

"But?" The Queen inquired. Her curious eyes studied me. Trying to figure out what I was trying to hide. "You know anything you say will stay in this room. Even if it is about my son," she assured me causing my eyes to widen. "Don't give me that look. I know my son and I know something happened between you two. He is never rude to anyone except you. Frankly, I don't understand why."

Well, shit. I thought we were doing a good job at hiding it but apparently, people can just figure it out. The fucker is totally going to kill me if he knew his mum found out. He'll never believe that I didn't tell her. My life is officially over. Though if she already knows, maybe I should tell her. He wouldn't have to find out and maybe I could tell my side of the story without making his mum hate him. Maybe I'm overthinking this. All I have to do is tell my story then I'll deal with the damage later. Goddess, this was stupid of me, wasn't it?