Programming

Connor:

I know I needed to rectify this, but for the first time ever I'm nervous to talk to a human.

For the first time I actually value someone else's opinion and want nothing more but for her to like me. Ever since I kissed her 2 days ago, she's been distant. She's always been distant but it was obvious she was downright avoiding me. I sit at my desk just staring at the computer screen, trying to think of how best to approach her. I wanted it to be today. I had to tell her how I feel. That she's the center of all of my emotional moments. That my goals are unclear and she has taken over my proccecors.

"Connor?" Hanks voice snapped me back into attention. "You alright over there? You look like you're thinking so hard I'm getting ready to catch any flying bolts." I chuckled at his joke, appreciating how hank never made my android-ness feel unaccepted.

"Yes Hank, I'm fine." He looked at me unimpressed. "Well..." I started, turning in my chair towards him and got close so the other officers couldn't overhear. "When you and your wife got into arguments how would you fix the relationship after?" His eyebrows raised in shock at my question.

"Jeez connor, uh" He said becoming visibility uncomfortable at the mention of his wife. "Lady problems?"

"Were not married hank." I said plainly.

"You little shit that's not what I meant." He said with a smile. "Look man, the thing I've learned about women is they like to talk. So talk to her. Tell her the truth and if she's right for ya, she'll understand." Hank leaned back in his chair, going back to his paperwork, "And if I know her, she'll understand."

I sighed and leaned back as well. He was probably right. My brain gets overloaded when I'm around her and I can't figure out the right thing to say. It feels so human to be so flustered around another person.

I'll talk to her after work.

I waited until I saw her clock out in the system to start walking to the front desk. She stayed really late tonight so the precinct had only androids and a couple cops left in it. I caught her right as she was walking out the door, calling her name. She turned, but her features dropped when she saw it was me. I tried to not let it hurt me as I caught up to her.

"What is it, Connor? I'm going home." She started walking faster now and we stepped out of the precinct, under the awning. The rain hit the street hard outside of it, drowning out the sound of her footsteps.

"I know I just-" I started but she kept walking away from me as I tried to talk "just... ugh, just wait a second" I grabbed her elbow and turned her towards me.

"What?" She huffed out and pulled her arm out of my grip as she turned towards me.

At least she stopped.

"I-" This nervous thing was not a fun emotion. My bio components felt like they were breaking. "I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry." I said the words quickly like they burned as they left my lips. She looked at me confused. "I'm sorry I kissed you and I'm sorry I invaded your space and said I was wanting yo- things..." The words poured out of my mouth in a jumble, none of my thoughts organizing themselves correctly. "I wouldn't want to do anything to make you uncomfortable." She huffed a frustrated laugh.

"Goddammit, Connor. I'm not mad at you becauss you think your feeling things or because you kissed me." She said and shook her head with a sigh. "I'm fine." She lowered her head so her hair falls and covers her face, puting her hands on her hips.

"Than why are you mad at me. I mean- I was designed to adapt to human unpredictability yet I can't figure you out!" The frustration building my system finally being released. "You say you're not afraid of me, yet act so different around me, You say youre fine, yet have been completely avoiding me. I just want to know why." I said, stepping towards her as I spoke, just desperate for an awnser.