𝗠𝗬𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗜𝗔: 𝗋𝖾𝗏𝗂𝖾𝗐 𝖼𝖺𝗌𝗍𝗅𝖾 . ☄ . [CLOSED]

───ㅤrich man's ransom

REVIEWER: DRA3TIX
CUSTOMER: YeonJeanLynn

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Cover [8/10]

The cover is pretty nice and visually appealing, and has elements relating to the title which is a good sign that you have paid attention to the details your cover requires according to the storyline.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Title [4/5]

The title is good, intriguing and less commonly seen in books now-a-days. I like how it's not too long nor too short and has a perfect connection to the main concept of the book.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Blurb [2.5/5]

The blurb kind of disappointed me with the very short length and not too much detail of what the story actually comprises. I believe it would be way more appealing for your book to put some edits in your blurb and make it a little better and also add details that bring the spark in readers to choose your book.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Inception [6/10]

Not a bad introduction of setting and events. However, it is very commonly used and too fast paced. I would also like to point out the straightforward way of describing things which could have been made better. The introduction didn't do much to make me want to read the book further unfortunately, it was too bland and almost the definition of ‘stereotypical’ Wattpad y/n.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Plot, Idea and Execution [16/25]

The plot is pretty decent, not too extraordinary but still worth a try. The idea is, however, pretty common and the story lacks the spark point that may make it seem out of the box or something that has a different charm to itself in the world of similar plot books. The execution goes very plain for my liking, it's as if everything is so into its place that it doesn't seem like a story where readers can be left in anticipation at times.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Characters and Emotions [9/15]

One of the biggest setbacks of your book. Why I say it is so, is because the story lacks a lot of realistic emotion delivery and characters that don't seem out of a fairytale. Everything starts out of nowhere and suddenly y/n starts thinking the janitor is stalking her from just a very small statement of Hanni. Very unlikely for someone in real life to act like that. However, this could have been fixed if there was a little time taken into bringing this idea in the main character’s head by providing valid evidence by creating actual situations. Another very unrealistic thing was how the girls were discussing a new janitor. You need to realise that this is literally a very rare case in real life and hence it seems very very superficial and for the sake of one main fantasy pleasing idea. You need to work on your characters and their emotion delivery by making them seem logically realistic. As said, not the stereotypical y/n fic.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Writing Style and Tone [6/10]

Plain writing style with very straightforward delivery, no suspense or build-up as if running onto the agenda of the main idea. You need to realise that writing style plays one of the biggest roles in building up execution of a story and your story lacks a lot of it with how straightforward things go and how fast it makes everything seem.

⟨ 🪄 ⟩ ── Grammar Point [12/20]

Multiple and pretty evident grammar errors hinder the reading experience and create confusion too at times. In your case, it didn't create confusion but did hinder the reading experience at times and I would love to see your book improve. I suggest going through the book again or hiring an editor to do the job to help you improve your book and rectify the errors. Overall your book can have a lot of potential if you put better and careful work into planning it out and writing it. Keep it up.

/ 🔮 / TOTAL ── [63.5/100]

–TEAM DREAMERS–