Hardships Of Love ⋆☆⋆ JAYWON

(5)

Jungwon

Everyone left to their own dorms while I stayed here in the meantime since jay was leaning onto me. I then started to think about how jay suddenly started hissing in pain when i rubbed against his arm,  i'm sorry jay but i just need to make sure you are ok, 

I opened his sleeve just to see some deep cuts on his arms. what the actual fuck?  they even look brand new, oh jay hyung what are you going through... I started treating his cuts careful to not wake him up. 

before we came here he locked himself in his bathroom...I dashed to the bathroom and opened the cabinets. I frowned as I saw blood stained razor blades but I decided to just leave it there for now ( little did he know he should've just threw it away )

I carried jay to his bed as he huddled into the crook of my neck.

When i placed him on the bed i decided to change his clothes as he was still using his school uniform. When i took off his shirt, I started to blush furiously as I shamelessly checked out his toned and slim waist, his soft and pure skin and his empty chest as I had some unholy thoughts, if only i could put my marks on him so everyone knows he is mine- WHAT THE FUCK?!  "yang jungwon get a fucking grip" i sighed.

I changed him into a t-shirt and some shorts as I frowned still looking at his arm. the things you do to me jay.  I was exhausted after doing all that, so I decided to cuddle with jay so I tucked him in his comforter and wrapped my arms around his waist, calling it a night.

...

Jay

"you faggot" 

" you are a disgrace to this family" 

" pfft, it makes sense that you are an omega" 

" bitch don't talk back to me"  

 *getting hit by a glass vase* 

"pfft twink"  *kicks*

 "are you a child now? AHAHHA- disgusting piece of shit"

"no one loves you" 

"your friends don't actually love you, you know? those are just my paid actors, you are just hopeless"  *chuckles*

*BRICK BEING THROWN* 

"PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" I shrieked, oh it was just another nightmare of mine, i felt some weight around my waist so I looked towards my right and saw jungwon cuddling me in his sleep, I then saw my arms bandaged, oh fuck jungwon saw them, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, I panicked as I ran to my bathroom and tried to look for my razor blades, relieved that it was still there, so jungwon didn't see the razor blades. 

I took out the razor blades again as I slowly cut dangerously near my veins wincing in pain, but it made me forget about all my struggles. The glistening beads of blood as they gracefully ran across his arm with every cut that is slowly getting deeper and deeper. I sighed. I had the sudden urge to experiment how it would feel if I drowned myself. I slowly turned the tap and watched as the water gushed into the bathtub.

*KNOCK KNOCK* 

I just ignored the knocks this time as I was watching how the bathtub looked so welcoming and calming until my thoughts were interrupted when I heard a loud thud.

There stood jungwon looking furious as he stared at my arms trickling with blood, the blood stained razor blades and the bathtub that is in the process of being filled up.

...

Jungwon

There I stood as I was taking in the sight that was in front of me, jay's arm trickling with blood, razor blades with fresh bright blood staining them and his bathtub slowly being filled up.

"why?" I asked, why are you doing this to yourself?  

he then fell to his knees and started to break down

I went up to him as I broke the razor blades using the bathroom counter and threw the pieces in the trash, making it so it is covered with his other garbage, I then turned off the tap and carried jay to the bedroom and started treating his cuts.

he winced in pain as i dabbed his cuts with alcohol.

"why are you so nice to me? aren't you disgusted that i cut myself? aren't you disgusted that i basically turn into a child? a-aren't you disgusted that I am an omega?" jay asked all at once as he continued to break down as I felt my shirt getting wet as his head was lying on my chest, the same question again. 

"no? why would i think that jong-ah? and don't you dare say it's because others think so, because I do not think so," I replied,

"my whole life i was belittled about it.." that's when i clenched my fists and tensed up as I felt anger building up, how dare they do that? are they really that much of a bitch pfff well i guess they are lucky because they just go the bitchiest bitch award made by me!

"I tried to make those comments not get to me but how? when my own parents think that as well" my heart dropped, his own parents? are they mental or something?   "you know what's funny, yesterday my mum called me because she wanted money from me like always" jay chuckled as he thought about that.

"how much" "wha-" "how much does she want?" "100 million won.." is that woman mental? well  yes she definitely is, he is still in college and you expect money from him? he needs to pay for his education.

I sighed, "don't worry about that" "what do you me-" "I will pay for it" "but-" I kissed his forehead to shut him up as he slowly processed everything and became flustered as I cooed at his flushed face as he tried to hide his face into my chest, my heart thumbing loudly as I felt butterflies in my stomach, the things you do to me jong-ah.

"I don't want you to spend so much money because of that thing" jay pouted looking at me with his doe eyes, those innocent eyes,  I immediately felt something twitch in my pants, ahh seriously? how did that turn me on? 

"don't look at me with those eyes.." I felt my cock twitch again as jay continued to stare at me with the same doe eyes and tilted his head in confusion, "why?" my phermones started to release into the air as i stared at him with lidded eyes, jay gulped as he saw the lust evident in jungwon's eyes.  

"o-ok I will stop, i'm going to go watch some tv.." jay hurriedly said and ran off blushing furiously.

I sighed as I went to his bathroom and took a cold shower to calm my dick down, seriously how did that turn me on? man i'm so whipped for this man.

___________________________________________________

a/n: Ok sooo progress? idk this story still fells like shit