Don't be Salty (A SaltTube fic)

Salty Tears

TestTube hadn't had much free time for about a week now. Her time machine wasn't even halfway rebuilt and her hope of leaving anytime soon was fleeting.

It's not like there was stuff Salt needed her to do, it's just that Salt wouldn't leave her alone.

Salt was codependent by nature, so this was honestly what she expected when she was chosen to co-host.

Currently, Salt was gossiping about some of the current contestants. TestTube had never been included in gossip before, and honestly it was oddly entertaining.

Though it prevented her from making progress on actually leaving.

"-I heard that before he came here he was in prison, because like, he totally killed this guy, and get this-"

TestTube doubted the accuracy of a lot of it, and yet she felt conflicted, this recent development prevented her from having the time to actually make progress on fixing the timeline, but deep down she found it rather cathartic to be included by this kind of person.

It's not like she'd not had friends before, but Salt reminded her of the popular girls who'd ignored her back in high school. Having her so intently ramble on and on to her was sort of satisfying. Though that certainly wasn't enough to make her want to stay, after all this was a dystopian nightmare timeline where all of her friends were likely dead.

Fan might be alive actually, he didn't join until season 2, and maybe he was smart enough not to join when Salt and Pepper took over.

TestTube stared at Salt, who was filing her nails as she ranted. She supposed she could just ask, she might as well get some info if this girl was going to talk to her either way.

"Was there ever a contestant here named Fan?" She blurted out, cutting off Salt mid-sentence.

"We've had a lot of contestants, like, come and go, how should I remember?"

"He was a red fan- very- geeky-" she pressed the issue harder than she should've. Salt paused, thinking.

"Hmm- yeah he auditioned, but he was like, ugly, and super nerdy! Not really a fit for my show, so I like, told him no"

TestTube was relieved. Fan is alive.

"Omg do you, like, know him?" Salt leaned in, intrigued, she wanted gossip.

"Just somebody that I used to know, it's boring. Not something you'd care for." Her tone was flat, trying to dismiss the subject.

Salt could tell TestTube wasn't saying something. And she couldn't stand it. It was written all over her face.

"Do you-"

TestTube needed to change the conversation fast. "What are you going to do about the cracks?"

Salt frowned "Oh I don't know, I'll have to, like, find someone to fix it"

"I could fix it, why don't I go find my tools? Then I can make it good as new" TestTube had been waiting for an excuse to get away.

"Ew you're such a nerd, I totally just, like, got the ick, but yeah, do it, I need these cracks gone, they remind me of that traitorous parasite" Her voice didn't carry the same venom as her words.

"Alright... it'll take a minute but I'll be back"

TestTube walked through the woods, calculating how long she could hide out and get some work done on her machine without suspicion when Lightbulb popped out of the bushes.

TestTube jumped back, startled.

"Heyyy TestTube!" She grinned

"Oh hey Lightbulb"