I don’t know how to describe her. It’s so hard to explain, yet she’s simple.
She’s beautiful. It’s a must with me, it’s the Darwin’s theory of natural selection in me. She has dark brown hair like Kate Middleton, straight-wavy-ish hair. The lightness and texture is a lot like my friend Daniella. ( this is going to make me sound so racist - but I prefer light skinned girls. I don’t know why. For years I have dreams about my lover. She’s not Asian, Black/North African, Hispanic the only excused Asians are Middle Easterns, or Hispanics that looks like Dani). Beneath that, she’s a girl who yearns for education, completely cultured. She’s into the Arts in every way. She might not be good in them, but she is a patron of the Arts.
She’s very witty and always insults me, but she doesn’t mean it in a hurtful way. And whenever she does want to hurt me, it’s in a way where I can listen to her and reconstruct myself.
She’s a strong woman and doesn’t need permission (independent), but it doesn’t mean she’s rude. She’s a very classy woman, we need more of those. So she has better language, and a better way of presenting herself.
She has a vibe of being a girly girl, but underneath that she’s not. She’s not afraid to speak up to correct the wrong (but it doesn’t mean she speaks up all the time - there’s a time for everything). She’s the type to fight for human rights and won’t rest til what is so close to her is solved.
She’s a religious yet nonreligious.
She of course loves Disney with her heart and like everyone else knows all of the words, and can be a complete kid at heart.
She does’t play hard to get (well she can, but not too hard - cause guys usually won’t get it if girls play it too hard).
And unlike what society imposes on a female mind, she doesn’t care if a guy looks like a model or not, muscular or skinny, she just wants a guy. She doesn’t starve herself, or think she’s fat. She can think that at times, but not to an extent where she changes her diet. Add on to that, she has a big appetite yet she looks so healthy.
In addition, she’s not those types of girls who wants to date, or see her lover every 5 freaking seconds. 3 days apart are completely fine, people have lives and so does she. She likes courting.
She’s very romantic. And I don’t know. She’s just her. It’s so hard to explain her.
I feel so nervous, and tight, yet I’m free and not nervous.
And she has these eyes where I can just stare into them and the world blurs out (which is hard cause I’m very observant). She’s just… her.
Yeah…
And the thing is, for the past 4-5 years, I have purposely took out my heart so I can’t develop feelings like this. I think it’s ridiculous, now I think the freezing time have expired. She makes me melt when I’m not supposed to. She’s my Cinderella.
