Secretive Sister

four

august 15, 2023: 11 am

y/n pov:

the girls and i are already having so much fun singing in the car. we are practically performing our own concerts back here. it's even more amazing when a taylor, selena, olivia, or sabrina song comes on. we scream so loud and whoever's song it is gets so embarrassed. it's great.

anyways we've been driving for 15 minutes now and i'm already getting nervous because i know they are going to eat like normal people and expect me to do the same. i have a gut feeling they suspect something so i can't afford to make weak excuses. but i also really don't feel up to or want to eat. i mean every time i do eat i just feel so shitty, mentally and physically, and i hate it.

once the current song ends i pipe up, "so what's our first stop?"

blake exchanges a mysterious look with my sister, gigi and selena before answering. "i suppose you can know stop number one. we are going to....." she pauses dramatically, "Grandma Thea's!"

I smile and try to act excited with the other girls but my heart drops. Grandma Thea's is our group's default breakfast place. Ever since I was a little girl we would make at least one trip a week there every time I came to the city. As much as I love the atmosphere and memories, I cannot eat. It's only a little past 11 and i'm not in a head space where i can eat so early, not to mention i just ate last night. fuck.

gigis pov:

after blake announces our plan, the other girls start chattering excitedly before getting back into their singing and dancing. because of this no one else notices how y/ns smile fades away after she believes no one is looking. i see anxiety cloud her eyes and watch as she closes them, breathing deeply. i recognize the pattern and realize she is trying to calm down her thoughts. i'm quite familiar with this technique as i actually taught it to her. this breathing pattern is one of the coping mechanisms i recommended after she was diagnosed with anxiety when she was 11.

the girls are shuffling around so i quickly get up and move closer to y/n. i gently grab her hand and rub my thumb over her knuckles. i don't want to make her feel embarrassed so i watch the girls, not even looking at her. i hear her start to breathe more naturally and only then do i look back at her. she shyly glances at me before whispering a quiet thank you. i smile and kiss her on the top of her head.

i'm glad she got over whatever was bugging her and it didn't cause an entire attack, but it only made the worry in my stomach grow. i mean, come on. we mention getting food and she pretends to be happy and then almost has a panic attack? this is not going to turn out well.

y/n pov:

shit. i don't care that gigi saw me being anxious, as she is actually one of my biggest supporters in that battle. i am worried abt the timing though. if she connects the dots to find a trigger than im in deep shit.

there is literally no way to make it through today without outing my ed other than just hoping this is the only meal and eating like normal.

we pull up to Grandma Thea's and all rush out. luckily the paps weren't waiting and we didn't draw too much attention. we walk in and taylor tells the hostess our reservation name. the girl leads us to a private room and we all sit down.

our waitress walks over and smiles at us and i recognize her from the last time we all came here. "hey everybody! nice to see you again! here are some menus, what would everyone like to drink?"

"ill take black coffee!" taylor says

"ill do orange juice" olivia orders

"ill do apple juice" sabrina adds