SKZ-TRAVEL || Finland

Chapter 4. Pure shock

Aamu's point of view
January 8th, 2024 

"T-tonight?" I stuttered out. 

"Yes. They're flying to Finland right now. When they get to Helsinki, they will take a train here. The estimated time of arrival is around 7:30 pm. I thought it would be good for you to get home a little early to get used to the thought. They have a Finnish director to the program, she will meet us in two hours or so.  We also have to go to the store and get something to eat. We're kind of in a hurry, so are you ready to go?" 

"I- I guess. I can't understand this. Didn't they have to do any security measures in our house?"

"They already did. Don't you remember that I sent you to your grandma's for the weekend? Some people came into our house to interview me. I had to sign an NDA, and probably so do you. You and the members will be filmed almost every moment of the day, but when cameras go off...that's when it is private. Do you understand that?"

"Of course."

My heart was still beating like crazy. Mom started driving home, but I was stuck in my mind. It couldn't be. There had been thousands, if not millions of participants. How was it possible for me to win? 

"I know that you are confused, so ask away if you have questions. I have tried to do all the boring paper stuff for you, so you don't have to. Obviously we must discuss some things with the director, but other than that you should be fine."

"How does the filming work? Are they gonna film us all the time?" I asked worriedly. The thought of being in front of a camera was really terrifying. I had never looked good in pictures, so how was I supposed to be filmed?

"The production team will install cameras in the living room, kitchen and other 'public' rooms. There will be no filming in bedrooms or bathrooms, if you don't give permission for that. All the footage will be run by us and the members before publishing, so we have a right to cut parts out."

"But what about you and dad? Will you stay with us?" 

"No! We will go to an Airbnb in the city center. You can call and visit us any time you want, if living with the members starts to feel uncomfortable. I have talked with the team a lot, and we have made up some rules that will protect each and everyone's rights. To be honest I still don't really like the thought of you living with men, but the director will be staying with you most of the time."

It was hard to breathe. My mind couldn't process the fact that I would get to see four of the members tonight. TONIGHT. It was too much to handle. 

"What will we do when they're here?"

"You have a new plan every week. The first three days are pretty much just getting to know each other. After that you will go to nearby places, study the Finnish culture and have fun. You will get the schedule from the director."

"Who is she?" 

"Her name is Salla Purunen, and she's 33 years old. She has been working as a director for documents for seven years. I have met her a couple of times, she is really nice woman."

We arrived at our house. It was hard to get out of the car as my legs were shaking so much. It couldn't be real, it just couldn't. 

"Salla will be here in twenty minutes. Do you want to chill until that or are you gonna continue on with the questions?" mom asked me as we got inside. 

"I won't be able to chill. I need to know everything. I can't with this. How am I supposed to survive two months with four men? Do they even know that I'm depressed? What if my condition will get worse??" I started panicking. There were too many things that could go wrong. 

"Calm down. We have everything under control. You will get used to it. And if your condition does get worse, then we will stop for a moment and visit the doctors. You don't have to do this alone. I'm here with you, dad's here with you and everything will be alright."

We chose to lie down on our corner couch to help me relax a little. Mom started playing with my hair, which made me feel a bit better. 

"Will there be cameramen in addition to the individual cameras?" 

"Yes, but mostly for different activities and challenges. You will have a mic in your clothes, or they will install mics around, it's not clear yet."

"Where will they sleep?"

"I figured that they can settle in to our book shelf room. I'm pretty sure it will be big enough for four people."

I was silent for some time, just trying to let all the facts sink in. Tonight. Felix, Bang Chan, HAN and Hyunjin. How? Why? What? There were so many questions and so many worries. But the biggest thing was just a huge question mark. 

"I know that this is a lot to take in in such a sort amount of time, but you will be okay. You can ask us anything, and we still have around seven hours to go. And if this doesn't seem to work, we can always cancel our contract."

I nodded. At the same time our doorbell rang. 

"It's Salla, and maybe her husband. He is a cameraman, so just be prepared that he might start filming already", mom said and got up to go open the door. 

She was right, Salla's husband came in with a TV camera on his shoulder. I went to shake hands with them. 

"It's so nice to finally meet you, I'm Salla."

"Aamu", I muttered. 

"I'm Saku, Salla's one and only", the husband joked as he shaked my hand. 

"Come further, please! I'm pretty sure you and Aamu have a lot to talk about", my mom smiled. 

"For sure. Aamu, do you mind if we start filming already?"

"I guess I don't. I'm just not really used to being filmed, so-"

"We completely understand. I'd just recommend you to try and ignore it. You will learn to close it out of your sight, but it's truly alright if you feel a little uneasy at first. We don't have to include this into the final program, so just relax."

I managed to smile a little, even though my body was still very stiff from the nervousness. Maybe I would really get used to it. I had to.