Hello, How May I Help You? | Lashton

Chapter 13

Yesterday was such a monumental event in history! I myself am not LGBT, but I support it and those who are. I am so happy that my favorite Youtubers, my friends, etc. can be just as happy as straight people are and not have to fight to be able to get married. ❤️

In honor of that and since this chapter is all about Luke's sexuality, I made a rainbow Luke :) #LoveWins

[Luke's POV]

I came so close to telling Ashton. I wanted help, I didn't know what to do. But I just couldn't. I don't know why, but u felt like he was going to judge me even though he was gay as well. I just couldn't bring myself to ask him how to be absolutely sure or whatever.

"Luke, baby, are you okay?" mum asked as she slowly came to down the stairs. I sat up on my elbows and looked at the blonde woman. "Ashton left looking kind of upset. Are you guys fighting?"

"No, mum. Nothing's wrong," I answered her, falling back into my bed.

"Bullshit, Luke. I know that there is something going on with you and I am determined to find out what," she said a bit more harshly. "What's wrong? You know you can tell me anything."

Once again, I almost said it. I almost outed myself to my mum. But I didn't because I choked and thought that she was going to hate me. I was going to turn into the Devil's work just because I may or may not be gay.

"Luke...?" mum asked me. "Please tell me."

"I...I need to sleep," I lied and flipped onto my side.

Mum turned the light off, making my room dark. But she didn't go upstairs. "I'm not going to pressure you into talking to me, but I want you to know that I am here for you no matter what."

I was about to say something, but then she hurried back upstairs and closed the basement door before I could talk. I needed to learn to have balls and tell her. I know she wouldn't hate me. The woman is the most accepting human being I know and she would try to accept this as well. 

I know I needed to talk to someone. I needed to tell somebody so I wouldn't drive myself insane because I had no idea what to do or think. I've never questioned my sexuality before. I've never considered myself anything but straight. 

"God dammit, I need to stop," I grumbled to myself. 

I needed to do it. I had to tell Ashton. Out of him, Michael, and Calum, Ashton was going to be the one who would understand what I was going through the most. I grabbed my phone and went to Facebook, knowing that I was going to be doing the right thing by doing this.

Luke Hemmings: Ashton, I have to talk to you in the morning. Can you come over before school and have Michael pick us both up?

Ashton Irwin: Yeah, no problem. Is everything okay?

Luke Hemmings: I don't know...I think so?

I turned my phone off after that, not wanting to answer anymore questions tonight. I had to mentally prepare myself for telling him tomorrow. I couldn't do it now. All I needed was a nice and long night's sleep to hopefully forget about it until I woke up again, but the likelihood of me even sleeping tonight wasn't good. 

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I was running around my room, hurrying to get ready before Ashton came knocking on my door so I could talk to him. I was scared of what was going to happen, what Ashton was going to say. Thankfully, mum got called into work early so she wouldn't be wondering why Ashton was here and why I was running around like a mad man. That's the last thing I needed. I didn't want to out myself to her yet. I had to talk to Ashton to make sure that I was for sure thinking I was actually gay. 

There was a knock on the door and I mentally swore. I ran up the stairs, wanting to go back downstairs and hide until I had to go to school, but I knew that it wouldn't do any good. Ashton was willing to be there for me and I couldn't turn that down. 

I opened it and saw Ashton standing there with his backpack over his shoulder and smiling tiredly. "Hey, Luke."

"H-Hey," I stammered, trying not to be too in awe at how hot Ashton looked when his hair was just carelessly thrown around his head. Jesus, I need to quit.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, a puzzling look crossing his face. "You didn't respond to my message last night and I've been worrying." 

"Um, I need to talk to you about something. I don't know what to do," I told him, sort of hesitant. 

"Okay, I'm here to listen," Ashton said with a small smile. 

I let him into the house and went down to my room, trying not to make it obvious that I was nervous and shaking. I was honestly so scared of what Ashton was going to say, even though he was gay as well. I didn't know what he was going to think or what he was going to say. 

"Luke?" Ashton asked, regaining my attention.

"Sorry, I was just thinking..." I trailed. 

"Okay, so what's on your mind? I can't guarantee I'll know the answer, but I can try as best as I can," Ashton told me. 

"I...I think...I think I'm gay..." I whispered. 

"What?" Ashton asked. 

I tried to read his face, see if he actually heard me and couldn't believe what he was hearing or if he seriously didn't hear me say it, but I couldn't tell. I really didn't want to repeat it again, but I knew that I had to if I wanted to get answers and feel this relief that people feel when they actually do tell someone.

"I didn't hear you, Luke," Ashton clarified. 

"I...I said that I think I'm gay..." I said again, a little louder. 

I looked at him again and then back down at the floor. He didn't look disbelieved or disappointed like I had thought he would. He actually looked like it was something people told him everyday. I wanted to know if he was mad or not. 

"I don't know what to do, Ashton! At least ans-" I started, but Ashton cut me off.

"First, calm the hell down," Ashton said. "I know you don't know what to do. I didn't either. Are you for sure you're gay?" 

"I don't know. I think so, but I don't know how to tell," I admitted.

"Do you want dick?" he asked bluntly.

"Excuse me?" I asked, the question catching me off guard.

"Would you rather have sex with someone who has a dick or someone who has a vagina?" he asked, making the question more clear.

"I don't know! I've never had sex before!" I squealed.

"Do you think Taylor Swift is hot? Or does she turn you on in any way, shape, or form?" Ashton asked.

"She's pretty, there's no denying that," I told him. Everyone that Luke has ever spoken to thought Taylor Swift was pretty, gay or not. 

"Damn you," Ashton mumbled.

"What...?" I asked, feeling my heart drop. What I didn't want to happen was happening. I didn't want Ashton to be mad at me for being gay, but he was. But why? He's not mad at himself that I know of. 

Before I could ask him again, Ashton was pressing his lips to mine. I didn't know what to think of what was happening other than the fact that Ashton Irwin was kissing me. It felt different than a girl's would. His lips were more firm and he was slightly more aggressive than a girl would be. But all in all, I enjoyed it. It was nice and it felt good. 

Ashton pulled away and looked at Luke with wild eyes. "Are you gay now?" 

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