Our doubts in Cupid [DRAFT]

What i like to call going out with a bang.. or crash-

Warnings
Profanity
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   You know, I think my boyfriend was loyal, perfect...any girl would want him! And yet every girl has got him...know that I think about it he sounds like any other f-/k boy

  Always asking to go on dates then ditching, asks u to block ur friends but he doesn't block people when u ask, he tells u and I quote "Your the love of my life! I would kill myself if u die!" Yet I don't see him in heaven yet. Maybe he's in hell-

   I hate this man almost as much as I hate cheesy fanfics about horny characters! U see, I hate love. F-/king hate it. My first bf in middle school dumped me because I wouldn't by him the new game he wanted! The second one was too famous for his own good, he dumped me because of my sense of style! Listen hoodies and jeans aren't bad fashion choices! They are comfy AND they have pockets!

  Then we have my third bf...Jax...the f-/k boy

   Here's a story for yah! Me and Jax were at my house, I was doing homework and Jax kept nagging me to cuddle with him even though my project was due in 3 hours!!and

Jax: babyyyyyyyy~ please??? I miss u~

Me: not now Jax....I have to-

Jax: come on Katie! Please! Even my ex left her work to hang out with me!

...

Ok maybe he was a red flag from the start- but my defense is he was hot at the time!!

Maybe if I wasn't so gullible I wouldn't be dead..and yet he and his new gf are alive and happy...or at least I'm guessing.

The person he's been cheating with...marci...a bully from our high school... apparently my social status back then was so low she didn't even look in my direction. I only found out he was cheating because my friend told me he was making out with her in the back of a Starbucks...WHAT!?

Ok if ur gonna cheat on me why in a damn Starbucks!?

The day after that I asked him about, he denied it and practically seduced me into staying with him. I wish he hadn't. I was so head over heels for him, I would have probably kissed his feet if he asked me to. I wish I wasn't. U can't change a man- well maybe u can but not in my case.

Weeks after that were lies...all lies... but I believe them. All my life people have lied to me, at this point I can't tell between them. Secret love sessions behind my back, date nights, they did it all

But I was to lovesick to see his cons..

Normally when the main character gets cheated on they get their big revenge that makes the cheater get down on their knees and beg for forgiveness, not me

February 14, the fateful Valentine's Day...Jax told me to met him by the train tracks, he said from there we would go on the next train the gardens..

I saw him waiting on the side walk, waving

We walked to the station, standing right next to the tracks..the train was coming.. he handed me a spider lily

Spider lilies...

These things were rare

If he gave this to me it must be more important than I thought

One thing popped into my head

One meaning

Death

Spider lilies mean death

As my thoughts finish I looked

"Jax...what does this mean? I thought we were going to the gardens?"

"Katie...I-"

Before he could I saw Marci run out from behind the pillar behind Jax..she pushed me...I landed on the tracks.. the train seconds away I looked up at Jax...expression less...his eyes had fear in the but Marci had an evil grin

Marci wrapped her arms around Jax

Jax just looked stunned like he hadn't planned this

Originally I thought my last words would be some sentimental sh-t.. but no

I mouthed the word "traitor" as I blacked out..only assuming I had died

And I was correct

Because now I'm here

In heaven

I don't know what is happening on earth but I can guess that Jax is happy with Marci

Well I'm a lovesick girl who died loving a man who planned her demise..

I hate love