Drunk love, a sequel - Johnnyboy

Chapter 7

Here we go again.

-

When Ponyboy first lost his parents, he wouldn't talk to anyone. Just Sodapop. But now, Sodapop is gone.

Ponyboy hasn't spoken to any of us for a month. He didn't even talk to us at Soda's funeral. And, we're getting really concerned. Dally, Darry, Steve, Two-bit and I were in the living room while Ponyboy was rotting in his bed. Alone.

"What are we going to do with him?" Steve asked, shoving his head in his hands. Darry sighed. "I don't know."
I thought we all silently agreed to let him be. "Let's give him time. He loved Sodapop more than he ever loved anyone." It hurt to know that he didn't love me more, but am I really going to be upset over that, while Ponyboy is grieving over the loss of his favorite person? I'm not that selfish. Dally shook his head no, and stood up quickly from the couch. "No, he's just a kid. He should be out with us." Not without Soda, I thought.

"Listen, let's just give him another week and if he doesn't talk to us. . we'll figure it out then." Darry said, with finality. We all nodded. We stayed silent until we heard a door open. I stood up and looked where the sound came from. It was Ponyboy.

He stood there for a moment, staring at me. He looked pale, sick, tired, and small. He hasn't eaten anything lately. I sighed, and bit my lip. He just stared. I swore I could see the hurt in his eyes. I gave him a weak smile. He turned away and walked into the kitchen. I bit my lip. I decided that I could use this as a chance to talk to him. I followed him into the kitchen. "Hey." I spoke, softly. He didn't answer. Instead, he opened the fridge and grabbed a yoghurt. "How are you?" I could've smacked myself right there. Ponyboy turned to look at me, with a half-disgusted look. My shoulders sunk and I felt my heartbeat increase. He grabbed a spoon and walked away. I couldn't just let him go like this. I quickly walked up to him, and hugged him from behind. "I love you."

I understand that it was pretty desperate for me to pull something like that, but I genuinely couldn't help it. Ponyboy was one of the only things that I loved. It was like he passed away too. He didn't say anything, again, and pulled away. I felt the tears swell up in my eyes. I thought it would be best that I make a mental note to break up with him, next time he comes out of his room.

Not because I was hurting, but because he was. He didn't have time to love anyone. He didn't have time to kiss me, or hug me. He didn't have the time. I bit my lip and let a tear slide down my face. "Johnny, it's not your fault. . ." Darry spoke softly. I sniffled and walked back into the living room, wiping my tears away. "I know. Well, I mean, I don't know. Should I just. . . break up with him?" I thought it was a good idea, but Darry thought otherwise. "No. Listen, I know it seems like he doesn't love you right now, but I know Ponyboy. He's just waiting to talk to someone. And, I'm sure that will be you. The reason he went to the lot in the first place is because he loves you."

I felt my heart skip a beat when he said that. So, was I the reason Sodapop got killed? No, that couldn't be it. I gulped and drew a quivering breath, shaking my head. "Darry, you don't understand. He literally just walked away." Everyone sighed and looked in opposite directions. "Because now is not the time. Look, if I was Ponyboy, I'd be doing the same thing." I huffed and shrugged. "Would you, though?"

Everyone fell dead silent. I swear I could hear everyone's heart beats. I could feel mine pumping, and pumping, non stop. I felt my arms and legs get heavy. I felt a haze flood through my mind. Well, I did, until someone spoke up.

"We should make Ponyboy his favorite meal." Two-bit said. His voice was slightly shaky, but I understood what he said. I sat on the ground and thought: burgers?

I nearly laughed at what I thought. "Maybe we could just make simple, plain burgers. With a side of chicken salad." Steve mouthed an 'ooh,' and nodded. Dally giggled, causing everyone else to, as well. I thought of when I made chicken salad here.

Ponyboy was sick, and I was madly in love with him. He just didn't know it. I nearly kissed him.

I shook my head and clicked my tongue.

"What are you guys doing today?" I spoke. "Me and Dal are going somewhere." Two-bit said. "Yeah, Soda and I-. . ." Steve started, and I frowned. I stood up and walked over to him. "C'mere, man." I spoke quietly, holding my arms up for a hug. We hugged each other, while Steve was quietly sobbing. "It'll be alright." I whispered into his ear. He nodded and pulled away, wiping his eyes.

"I'll come with you, Steve. I don't have anything better to do. Johnny, you stay here with Ponyboy. Make sure he doesn't do anything stupid." Darry spoke. I nodded, and watched them all leave the house.

-

After I fell asleep on the couch, I noticed how quiet it was here. I stood up and walked to Ponyboy's room, debating on whether or not opening the door. I gulped and knocked, hoping for just one signal of him. To my surprise, he spoke ever so softly: "Yes?" He sounded like he needed to cough really bad. I opened the door and nearly gasped. It's a mess. "Pony. ." I whispered, staring at him. He was laying on his stomach on his bed. "What?" His voice was muffled.

I stayed silent for a minute. "I've missed you." As corny as it sounds, I did.

I stood in the doorway, silently. He sat up and rubbed his eyes. "Okay."

"Okay?" I repeated. "I've missed you, too." I had to remind myself that he was in no condition for an argument. Neither was I. We were both vulnerable in that moment. "You feel okay?"

"Mentally or physically?" I shrugged. "Both." He sighed.

"No."