The Puzzle Of Love | Ishman

Ch.2

️️⚠️hint of rape ⚠️

*Ishan's POV*

My stupid mind has caused me to act just so strangely to Shubman who was probably just being nice to me. God, I felt so embarrassed. I should probably apologize to him tomorrow, that is if I see him.
He did say he wanted to.

Pushing these thoughts to the back of my mind, I tried to sleep through another night, just wanting it to be morning already.
What am I even supposed to do with the morning?

---

"Trust me, Ishan"
"I do. I trust you."
..

"I can't love you, it's impossible"
..

Hurting, I woke up suddenly.
"Stop. Please stop this, please" I begged into the darkness, wanting to stop having these dreams, about things I wanted to let go of, but I just can't seem to.

I considered sleeping again, but I knew it would just hurt me and I'll end up sobbing like every night. I decided to have a short stroll outside, putting up my hoodie on, even though it was just the start of July.

(A/N y'all, it's that white hoodie)

Fetching my wallet and my phone, I went to the centre market. The cafe's and some restaurants won't shut until late midnight and it was just a bit past 11.
The street wasn't at all busy, cars honking occasionaly and just a few people who were probably returning to their homes after a long day, returning to people who were waiting for them, loved them.

Passing through the street, lit up by street lights and a few advertisement boards, I went towards the quieter one, hoping to forget whatever I was thinking about and find my sleep again.

About halfway into it, I heard a car honk. I stepped aside turning around to find a black car speeding deadly, moving only closer towards me.

Black car. I've only hated those. I prayed that the car just passed away so I could get back to slowly wandering about again.

It honked about twice more, while I pretended not to pay attention to it, stopping abruptly, the driver stepped out of it obviously moving towards the only person present in the street except themselves.
I didn't budge until a very unpleasant smell of alcohol mixed with my breath, making me feel uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry, but I think you look like someone I know" The voice said. I knew that voice. No. No. It can't be, I thought I left him forever.

"I- I don't think so"
"Can I just..." He said, holding my face with a very strong and uncomfortable strong grip, forcing me to look at him.

NO.

I instantly freed myself from his grip, trying to move away, but he didn't let me.
"Ishan? Is this really you?"
"Who's Ishan?" I tried. "What do you even want from me. Go away!"
"You can't trick me, Ishan. I'd never forget that pretty little fuckwithable face of yours."
"Step aside, you asshole. I'm saying this for the last time."
"What you gonna do? Hurt me?" He smirked, his alcohol stinking breath very close to my face.
"Leave me! I told you I'm done with you! Go away!" I shouted. Why isn't anyone here to stop him? Why can't I do that myself?

A slap hit my face, the voice still ringing in the quietness.
"You don't get to shout at me like that" His voice now raged with anger. My body fell numb, helpless.
Go away Go away Go away was all my mind kept repeating.

"I guess I'll have to remind you how much you love me, how much you wanted this, didn't you? Don't you?"
He said through gritted teeth. No I didn't. I don't. I don't. Help, someone, please.
My head started to hurt more than it already was. The last few things I remember was Ryan raising my shirt up, digging into my scarred skin with his disgusting teeth, leaving traces of drool and saliva.