The glue that held me together: a Newtmas fan fic

Chapter Nine

She stares into my eyes, into my sole and whispers "Thomas." How does she know my name?
I just stand there in shock. "Tommy?" Newt whispers, "Do you know her?"
"I..I don't know. I don't think so I can't remember her." I say to Newt.
"Tom," She whispers looking heart-struck. "Don't you remember me? It's me Teresa!"
I stare at her blankly. I feel my face go numb. Who is she? How does she know who I am?
Newt walks over to stand next to me. He nudges his arm against mine in attempts to try to comfort me. He whispers, "Tommy, are you okay?"  
"I'm sorry." I whisper to the girl, Teresa thinking that was the right thing to say. "I'm sorry, I don't know who you are."
"Tom!" Teresa says, "We promised!"
This was starting to freak me out so I ran, ran into the forest, as far away from here as I could get. "TOM!" I here her shout from the slammer, but I ignore her desperate plea for help and keep running.
I stop running when I reach the forest that I first talked to Newt in. I look at the water I want to go into it to wash all of this confusion and pain off. I remove all my clothes apart from my boxers and put them onto the rock Newt was sitting on before, then I wade into the cool water and I swim, swim and wash all the dirt and pain from the last few days off me.
I swim for what feels like hours until I here someone. "Tommy!" The voice shouts, instinctively I know it's Newt, only he is the only one who calls me that. I feel a wash of gratefulness flood through my body. I don't think I could handle anyone else with all the bullshit going on right now. "I was worried about you." Newt says, "Are you okay?"
"Yeah." I lie.
"You know you can tell me anything, anything at all I will keep any of your secrets, I promise."
"Yeah I know."
"Do you trust me?" Newt says.
I didn't really know how to reply. Do I really trust him? Yeah I trust him more than any of the other cranks in this joint, but  I hardly even know the guy. For all I know Newt could just be trying to gain my trust so I will tell him things so he can tell everyone else.
"You don't do you." Newt says with a hint of disappointment.
I feel horrible. How could of I done that, made the only person that gives a clunk about me feel bad. In attempts to try to make him cheer up I say, "I trust your more than anyone else in this Glade." I don't think it worked though he still looks just as down on himself as before. 
"How can I make you trust me?" Newt asks. 
"Umm..I don't know." I reply, "I guess I will trust you more over time."
"But we don't have time." Newt replies.
"What do you mean we don't have time?" I say shocked at his response to what I had said.
"Tommy," He says, "Even if you don't, I trust you, okay? You have to know that what I am about to say is extremely hard for me to say and you must never tell anyone this okay?"
"Newt, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to." 
"I want to, I think it will make you trust me more and that is all I want right now your trust. Now promise me."
"I promise."
"Okay," Newt says, "A while back before you came to the Glade I was a Runner."
"You were a runner?" I asked, "Why did you quit?"
Newt looks towards me annoyed. "Yes I was a runner and I'm going to get to that question soon just be patient and be quiet."
"Okay," I reply, "Sorry."
"So I was a runner, a pretty good runner if I do say so myself. I became a runner since I first awoke in the box. I was curious like you always asking questions, so being a runner was a great thing, as I was able to try and find the answers to my own questions with nobody telling me that I can't. Nobody but me. A few months after running the maze continuously I fell into a state of depression. I felt that I was useless, that I was a burden to the Glade, I felt that the Glade was better of without me."
"Oh Newt." I mutter. How could he feel that way if it wasn't for him I would probably be feeling that way. He has been the only nice one in this shucking hell hole. 
"Over the next few months these feelings became worse and I just couldn't handle it anymore. So one day when I went out into the maze I climbed one of the walls, right to the top and I jumped." Newt is in tears now. I walk over him and sit next to him, I put my hands around him and pull him into a hug, just wanting to stop Newt feeling anymore pain.
Newt goes on "I just wanted it to end, the pain the suffering. The Glade was killing me, it wanted me dead and it would have succeeded if Alby didn't come and take me back to the Glade."

I am starting to cry to now, we cry into each other. "Is that how you got your limp?" I whisper. Newt nods his head. 
We sit there in each others arms for what only feels like minutes but was actually hours. I feel his soft skin against mine. But even though I the heat from his body radiate through mine I start to shiver from the cold, since I am still only in my boxers. He feels me shivering and pulls away. He walks over to where my clothes are and grabs them, he brings them back to me and pulls the shirt over my head and running his fingers down my body with the shirt.
"Are you warmer now?" He asks as he hands me my pants. "Put your pants on to."
I get up and pull on my pants as he says, "We probably should get back to the Glade, we've been gone for a while, they probably are worried about you."
"They probably aren't." I say as we start to walk out of the forest.
"You are probably right, they would be to preoccupied with that girl ."
We walk the rest of the distance to the Glade in silence until we reach the edge of the camp. I grab Newt's hand to stop him and whisper, "I do trust you."

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I'm standing in the middle of the Maze. Everything's dark. I look around to see if anyone's there.
"Hello?" I say. There is no reply
"Hello?" I say a little louder. I'm starting to panic, no ones around and i'm in the middle of the Maze at night. There is probably grievers around and i am stuck here, no one to help me, no one to save me, I am alone with the grievers. "Hello!" I'm practically shouting now, but I know no one will answer.
I start to run in attempts to escape, even though I know that it is pointless. No one is going to be out here at night. I don't even know how I got here. 
I have no idea where I'm going I just keep running, turn after turn, corner after corner. How did I get here? What's happening? I turn another corner and freeze. I know something is wrong, there is something there. I look up and sure enough there is a griever staring at me. We both stand still for a second. What am I going to do? I can't take on a griever. I look at the griever closely and I notice it has something on it's leg. It looks like flesh. I feel sick, this is the one, the griever that killed Alby. This is the bitch that killed my leader, my friend. Without thinking I grab the thing closest to me, which turns out to be a stick and i charge at it screaming at the top of my lungs. If I kill it Alby will be avenged if this bitch dies I won't feel so bad anymore. 
It starts charging at me screeching. It is hurdling towards me, I know I won't survive this but it killed Alby so I have to kill it. We get closer and closer together, and as we get closer my determination to kill it increases, no one kills my friend and gets away with it. 
We are only inches away now, but I don't feel as though I am going to die I feel like I am as alive as I've ever been. As we collide I scream, I scream as loud as I ever had, I feel intense pain flood through me. I attempted to stab it to death but it's no use the monster is  stronger than me, it climbs on top of me and howls. 
It's about to hit me one last time when I see something above me on the top of the maze wall, it is Newt, he is about to jump. 
"Newt!" I shout, "Newt! Please don't jump! Newt!" 
He takes a step off the wall and plummets to the ground and lands beside me. 
"No! NEWT! You can't die! NEWT! Please don't die! I care about you Newt!" I shout but it's no use his body lies there lifeless.
"KILL ME!" I'm shouting at the griever now. "KILL ME YOU BASTARD!"
But it just stares at me with a smile on it's face and shakes it head."Thomas," A voice that i recognize as Teresa's says, "Thomas, you are the one, you did this to them."
"No, NO!" I shout, I didn't do this to them the griever did this I was trying to avenge them. "He did this to them," I point to the griever that has me pinned down, "That!"
"You did this to them, You killed them." The voice said. 
"NO!" I scream

I wake up screaming. 

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Sorry if that chapter was to long. And Im sorry for not posting in forever but I had homework, I am only holidays now so we might be able to post more.

- Jessica