I get home and sit down, it was silent. I turn the tv on flicking through the channels, nothing.
My phone starts vibrating in my pocket I grab it and see Leah's calling me, my finger hovers over the hang up button. It stops ringing, I ended it. I don't know why but I couldn't face her, not yet.
There's a knock at the door I slowly walk over and see Amanda stood there. "Hi sweetie" she says
"Hey, come in" I say with a smile
"Everything okay?" She asks as she looks around
"Yeah you?" I ask
"Yeah" she says
We go into the living room and I say "can I get you a cuppa?"
"Yes please" she says
I make us both some coffee before heading into the living room with the two mugs.
"I know you don't know why I'm here" she says
"Yeah" I say
"Leah's worried about you, so I promised I would pop in" she says
I shrug my shoulders "what's up?" She asks
My eyes look down to my knee then back up to the woman, "I don't even know" I say
"You can talk to me about everything" she says
"I know" I say
I felt the tears take over. My knee was resting, Amanda comes over and embraces me in a hug. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess" I say
"No, don't be sorry. I understand" she says
I calm myself down and I say "it all started when they were getting ready for the euros. I guess I was jealous they got to be a part of it, don't get me wrong I'm proud of them immensely. I just, I couldn't bare to look at them or talk to them. It's not them it's me"
"I understand" Amanda says still hugging me
"When Leah got the call of Sarina saying she was captain, I got more annoyed at myself. Why couldn't I be a part of a team that has the potential to lift a trophy, where my girlfriend could lift it" I say
"I'm so happy for them all, I'm trying to be happy for myself. But I don't know anymore" I say
"I know, but please call Leah. She's really worried about you" Amanda says
"I know, I just don't even think I can form words right now" I say
"I know I'm being a shit girlfriend and sister to Beth because I've tried my hardest at avoiding everything, I know I need to talk to them." I say
"It's okay" Amanda says
My phone starts to vibrate, FaceTime by Leah. "You can do it" Amanda says, I take a gulp and answer.
"Hey" she says with a smile
"Hi" I say
"How are you?" She asks
"Don't know how to explain it" I say
"Caitlin's told me some of it" she says with softening eyes
I give her a soft smile and say "I'm proud of you"
She giggles lightly, "I'm glad" she says
"How's camp?" I ask
"It's good, the girls being their mischievous self. Sarina told us you could have tagged along, why didn't you? We could've really done with some inspiration" Leah says
"I don't think you need my words, you all played brilliantly against Belgium" I say
"We could always use with some wise words from you" she says
I laugh and she asks "are you coming to the next game?"
"I don't think so, I think I'm going to see my dad" I say
"How is he?" She asks
"Not good, he is just surviving. I can't even imagine what he's going to be like" I say
She gives me a sympathetic smile and says "Beth wants to talk to you, she's been stressed out lately"
"How come?" I ask
"Your dad, Viv" Leah says
"Viv?" I question
"They've been together for ages right? But apparently Viv wants a puppy" Leah says
"Aah yes, the famous puppy I've heard about. Trust me she's been begging for one for at least the last two months" I say
Someone walks into Leah's room "oh hey" Georgia says to the phone
"Hi G" I say
Amanda shows herself "Georgia, it's so good to see you! Leah has been so consistent with me not being allowed to speak to you" she says with a laugh
"Mum?" Leah exclaims
"I'm glad I get to see you too Amanda, honestly us two we are double trouble right" Georgia says
"Most definitely" Amanda replies
After a while Georgia leaves the room and Amanda leaves. "I miss you" I say to Leah
"I miss you too, but I'll see you soon" she says
"I know you probably won't want to talk about everything right now, but remember I'm here" she says
"I know you are le, I know. I know Beth's there as well, but that's the thing. Everyone gets to be a part of something I wanted to, and I guess you could class it as jealousy. But it's something more" I say
"I know, it's called a love, a passion for something. Your hungry for victory" Leah says
The door in Leah's room opens "is she there?" Beth questions. Leah nods and Beth comes over "hi" she says with a smile
"Hey Beth" I say
"I'm so happy to see you" she says
"Yeah" I say
"I miss you" she says
"I miss you too" I say and feel the tears fall. "God I'm sorry, I'm such a mess" I say and stand up finding some tissue.
"Don't be sorry" Beth says
"Beth I've got to have my press with Sarina, is it okay if you look after my phone" Leah says
"Yeah" Beth says
"See you later, bails I love you" she says and blows a kiss at the camera
"Love you" I say
Me and Beth talk some more, then her face changes.
YOU ARE READING
Two sisters. Two lives.
RomanceBailey mead is the sister of Beth Mead, after both of them coping with the loss of their mother, how do they save themselves from falling but grieving at the same time. They never got on, but will they find a new connection that helps them fall back...
