Your gonna miss me when I'm gone

chapter 23

Beca couldn't remember the last time she had been so tired. She had forced herself to stay awake throughout her discussion with the doctor. Frankly he was astonished that she had managed to make it out of the hospital by herself, completely unaided, without doing barely any damage to herself. That nearly made the whole thing worth it. Nearly. What had really made the whole escapade worthwhile was her lunch with Chloe. There had been some moments between the two that confused Beca to no end. What was her relationship with this girl? This girl who made her feel things.

Beca was drawn out of her throughts when the doctor said the word "stroke". She paid close attention whilst the doctor regretfully told her of the risk of regaining her memories. Seeing the distress upon her face, he decided the best thing to do would be to leave her to rest and speak to her when she felt better.

But Beca couldn't rest. How could she? She had just been told that the reason that kept her going could kill her. Do I ever get a fucking break, she thought bitterly. She could hear the doctor talking to somebody outside and realised after a minute that Chloe was outside with, was her name Aubrey? Beca tried to listen but her eyes drooped of their own accord thanks to the drugs that she had just been pumped full of. At least she wasn't in pain anymore. That was always a bonus. She sighed, giving into her exhaustion, despite her overactive mind.

Her dreams were plagued with bright blue eyes and red hair. At first Beca didn't understand what she was seeing, but it soon became clearer.

It was raining. And hard. It was as if the heavens had decided to open up and attempt to flood Barden University campus. And yet, Beca found herself walking in this. She realised that she must have intentionally gone for a walk in the rain as she wore nothing but her jeans, boots and an old Stokes t-shirt. No umbrella, no jacket.

And yet, she felt at ease. It was as if the rain was washing away her worries. But what were her worries? She couldn't remember. But she still enjoyed the feeling of the fat droplets of water hitting her and running down her bare arms and down her face.

She wasn't walking with a purpose. She had nowhere to be. No one to see. Nothing to do. Except walking. She realised that she had left the campus now and was walking out of town, just enjoying the rain. She had left her headphones back in her dorm room, not wanting to get them wet in this weather. And yet, she didn't mind the lack of music. She could hear the steady bass of the pounding rain and that was enough.

The majority of the shops and cafes were closed, not that she would have gone in there anyway. She no idea of the time or the day. It was warm though, the rain probably cutting through the humidity that hung in the air.

Beca found herself at a cemetery. Without questioning, she let herself in through the gate and walked amongst the tombstones. She tried to remember why she was walking, but the memory evaded her. Instead, she took a seat on a bench under a willow tree, keeping it relatively dry.

"Beca?!" She knew that voice. She turned and saw a hunched figure hurrying towards her, huddled under an umbrella. Only when the figure had, too, stopped under the willow tree and had put down her umbrella did Beca recognise that flash of red hair.

"Chloe? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same question."

Beca hesitated. She didn't want Chloe to think that she was weird. "I went for a walk." She said lamely.

Chloe looked at her closely. "In this weather?" Beca nodded, not meeting the redhead's bright blue eyes. "Beca? What's wrong?" she felt Chloe sit next to her and the redhead forced her to look at her. "Beca?"