Me, My Ex, and Him

Chapter 3: To New Beginnings

          I would spend most of my freshmen college days participating in my club's activities. I got to spend more time with Boboy as he helped me get better at my craft. Boboy helped me navigate through the photo editing software, and guided me on how to pick the right color-grading for my photos. Our training session was almost finished for that day, so we said goodbye to each other. I arrived at my house and then went straight to my bedroom. He and I were messaging each other online. We had already connected on Facebook then. 

          Boboy: "Medyo okay na yung color-grading mo."

          Lia: "Dahil yan sayo. Salamat sa pagtuturo. Pro ka talaga."

          Boboy: "Hindi nga."

          Lia: "Hahaha. XD Sige na. Mag-aaral muna ako. See you."

          Boboy: "Okies. See you. :)"

I smiled upon re-reading our little chat.

          Meanwhile in Cebu, Yvan was hanging out with his clique during their vacant time at school. 

          "My Love?" The male friend questioned him. 

          "My love pa gyud?" (Translation: You haven't changed her name on your phone?), he continued.

          "I forgot to change it! Okay Val?" Yvan defended himself.

His friends were all teasing him and laughing about it. Yvan and his two friends then had a conversation about our past relationship. They also suspected he still may have some feelings for me then, but he denied it. Yvan told them that he will always care for me and that I had a special place in his heart. Cheesy as it sounded to Em and Val, they still kept on teasing him.

Em continued to persuade Yvan to contact me, even only to ask me how I was doing at the moment. Yvan silenced. His eyes directed to the ground, keeping silent. His friends could clearly tell Yvan felt uneasy with Em's suggestion. An apologetic Em tried to lighten up his mood and apologized for persuading him. 

          "It doesn't feel right. I'm sure she's doing fine..." Yvan then sighed.

          "I don't want to bother her for now." Yvan explained further.

Val broke the dramatic moment by inviting the gang to go clubbing hoping to cheer Yvan up. However, Yvan declined as he wasn't the type to party. Annoyed, Val suggested to chill somewhere more quiet and peaceful to which Yvan finally agreed to. It was already the end of their last period. Yvan, Em and Val went on a joy ride with Val as the driver, Em on the passenger's seat and Yvan at the back.

Yvan was unaware that the place they were going to would be quite far. He started to reminisce about that time he was going to tell me the bad news. He didn't know how to feel. He wasn't sad but he wasn't giddy either. To escape from his thoughts, he jokingly complained about the long trip. The trio finally arrived at the place. It was a café on the mountains. The wind at night was refreshing. The place looked so peaceful. The three friends then sat, getting ready to order something.

Em just went blunt and told Yvan she did not want to see him all miserable. Though he denied, as usual, his lady friend didn't buy it. This led Em to suggest Yvan to go on dates again. However, Yvan was ignoring Em by reading the menu, thinking of what to order. Val then teased by suggesting she and Yvan should date instead. The two felt awkward and told Val he's being ridiculous.

          "Okay... Let's say I'm going to put myself out there..." Yvan asked curiously.

Em and Val's faces lightened up as they felt hopeful.

          "Pero, I need to let my best friend know about it first." He added.

          "Hays, best friend na ex-girlfriend. Unsaon naman pag move on ba?" (Translation: How can you move on if you need to consult your girl-best friend all the time?) Em commented sarcastically.  

But Val told Em to just let Yvan do what he wants to do.

          The following day at school, Boboy and I were walking together, and we shared a conversation to get to know each other. We then made it to a waiting shed .

          "Marami ka na bang mga kaibigan dito?" He asked me.

          "Kayo lang ni Noah, at iba sa co-members natin sa club." I answered him.

I was lost in my thoughts for a moment. 

          "O ano?" He asked concernedly.

          "Wala. Naalala ko lang yung best friend ko." I sheepishly told him. 

          "Nasaan ba yung best friend mo?" He asked curiously. 

I took a deep breath then paused, not knowing how to feel about Boboy's question.

          "Nasa Cebu." I told him .

He could tell I felt uncomfortable talking about Yvan. He was speechless for a short moment. I knew it wasn't his intention to make me feel that way. So, I tried not to act how I felt. Anyway, it was on me for mentioning about my best friend. 

          "Kakamustahin mo." He suggested.

I guess those were the words he could think of saying to fill in the awkward silence. I just smiled at him. I wasn't offended by the thought of it. I knew deep down inside that I wanted to hear from Yvan again. That day, after the club meeting, Boboy offered to accompany me to wait for a public transportation (a jeepney) outside. I dearly appreciated his concern. It felt like he wanted to make sure I traveled safely. As I stepped onto the Jeepney, he waved goodbye, both smiling at each other as we part ways.

          I was already at home and I was standing in my bedroom feeling anxious while holding my phone. I was really longing to reach out to my best friend. I murmured to myself that I could do it and that I wasn't afraid to message him. I should have finally read those unopened messages I got from him last summer. I opened my Messenger account, searched for Yvan's name, tapped on it, then began typing. I was so scared, drowning in so many negative thoughts, and I had mixed emotions. What if he was mad I didn't reply to him last summer? What if he has a girlfriend by now? So, I took a deep breath before proceeding.

          "Best, kamusta ka?". I was going to message him those exact words. My thumb was shaking as I was about to tap that tiny arrow on the screen. There was no backing out now. I was going to send it right that instant. Ring! My phone rang. The caller was no other than Yvan himself. I was so surprised. My face looked like I've seen a ghost. I could hear my heart beating fast. The next thing I knew, I answered it.

          "Best?" I asked, still feeling shaky.

          "Hello Best." He answered.

I told Yvan I was just about to message him, and by the sound of his voice, he was giddy. We caught up through phone conversation. We talked about our university life, and what we were up to these days. He said he had met new friends, hence I knew Em and Val by names. I also told him about the photography club I joined. Yvan encouraged me to keep doing what I was passionate about. I also wished him to be happy with what he was doing at that season. I even encouraged him to pursue his dream of becoming a singer and musician. After our short conversation, he told me he wanted to meet other people and date again. I felt relieved he made efforts to move on, because I was in the process, too.